Swallow Time

The Amazing Bob accompanied me to Mass Eye and Ear yesterday. I had an appointment with a swallow specialist. No, I’m not rockin’ a case of The Birds though wouldn’t that be interesting!? This has something to do with those menigiomas up top my noggin. No, I’m not entirely sure what the dealio is but my persistent cough and swallow issues are somehow related to those annoying bastards (there’s three of ‘em up there just hangin’ out, gettin’ fat. Fuckers!).

In any case, TAB and I, at these visits, are like Bob Newhart and Suzanne Pleshette OR mebbe Richard Pryor and Gene Wilder...one or the other. Yes, we pay attention to what the docs say BUT everything must be leavened with humor. A LOT of it.

At yesterdays appointment, the good Doctor Song (GREAT name!) ran a probe down through my nose into my throat. I know EEWWWWWWWWWWWWWW! Nah, wasn’t bad and, best of all, there was a video screen so’s I could watch the probe’s progress. Awesome! Very Fantastic Voyage-y. I always think I'm gonna be too grossed out or to watch this shit but, as with that spinal tap from eons ago, if the medics let me watch what they're up to, I'm totally hooked in—utterly focused. After all, it's not everyday that I get to see me from the inside.

The verdict? More tests. OK. Hopefully the next one will have a floor show as well.