Winter Words

Peripeteia
noun 
     a sudden turn of events or an unexpected reversal, especially in a literary work.

Sounds more like a skin disease. Ya know a common, easily curable one IF caught early enough, otherwise disgustingly, oogily fatal.

Esculent
adjective
     suitable for use as food; edible.

Kala had moved slowly along an elephant track toward the east, and was busily engaged in turning over rotted limbs and logs in search of esculent bugs and fungi …
~ Edgar Rice Burroughs, Tarzan of the Apes, 1912

EWWWWW!

Forby
preposition, adverb
     Chiefly Scot.
     besides.

Ither laddies a’ oot playin’ at something, an’ forby it’s no healthy to sit too lang aye readin’.
~ James C. Welsh, The Underworld, 1920

No. Forby MUST be a noun.

Forbys can mostly be found down at your local toy store. They’re sweet, stuffed, plush toys – beasties resembling a cross between a bunny and a bear. Now then, real life, non crib occupying, forbys were long in the sharp claw department, wild and fierce as all hell. Believed extinct now, they generally lived in the far northern Scottish Highlands where they preyed on bagpipers. TRUTH!

Fastigiate
adjective
     having branches that are erect and parallel, tapering to a pointed top.

This is actually a word which describes when you’re in a high state of fussily, frenzied agitation and just can’t sit still.

Donna, you’re fastigiating again. CALM DOWN!

Horologium
noun
     a timepiece, as a clock or sundial, or a building supporting or containing a timepiece.

Nuh huh. Logium is Latin for priestly breastplate and Horo – obvs that’s short for horror. Clearly this word means fear of priests.

Strepitous
adjective 
     boisterous; noisy.

Specifically, this refers to the cough you have when you’re suffering from strep throat.

Avocation
noun
     something a person does in addition to a principal occupation, especially for pleasure; hobby:

NOT to be confused with an avocado – a popular fruit often found smashed and spread on lightly toasted sourdough bread, This pairs perfectly with a fine New Zealand Sauvignon Blanc. Wouldn’t that be a hell of a happy avocation though? Sitting in the warm noonday sun munching a healthy snack whilst sipping a fine Kiwi wine.

Ipso facto
adverb
     by the fact itself; by the very nature of the deed

The Tangerine TreasonWeasel’s mouth is open, ipso facto, he’s lying his large misshapen ass off.

Simony
noun
     the making of profit out of sacred things

See Jim Bakker, Paula White, Franklin Graham, Joel Osteen, etc.

Cucullate
adjective
     resembling a cowl or hood

No, it's the sound made by cuckoos when they’re trying to attract a mate.

Thither
adverb 
     to or toward that place or point; there.

No. This is a zither with a lisp. K? Let’s get these things straight

Obumbrate
verb (used with object) 
     to darken, overshadow, or cloud.

Related – Obumbration. The dark, depressed state from which the nation suffers now that The Obamas are out of the White House.

Chthonian
adjective Classical Mythology. 
     of or relating to the deities, spirits, and other beings dwelling under the earth.

Sounds more like a case of stuffed up sinuses to me.