Detachable Body Parts, etc.

My faithful guard/nurse cat, Cake

I want this. WHY in this advanced engineering day and age, are detachable body part not an option?

Yesterday I had some definitely not insignificant pain in the ol’ twin peaks. Was it those assholian menopause hormones? Do I need to get measured for a new, better fitting bra? Is it because I took a day off from exercising and sat around reading in the same position for too long? Could my thoracic spine monster be starting some shit again? Is this what a stroke feels like? Cancer? Is this normal?

No, I didn’t go to the emergency room. A couple Tylenol, ibuprofen, a gummy, and a nap did the trick. I recently had a mammogram and all was groovy so what the fuck? I’ll contact the doc squad today.

What I would have loved to do, more than anything, is just pop those babies off and put them on a shelf. OR I could’ve dropped them off at the medic mechanic shop and gone about my day. I mean, do I really need to be there while they hoist the old orbs up onto the lift for a diagnosis?

Maybe, if reincarnation is an actual thing, coming back as a human wouldn’t be SO awful. Rather, it wouldn’t be as long as healthcare has evolved sufficiently by then. What I need is a Scalzian threep, AKA personal transport (an android but with my brain and consciousness—see the book Lock In) or a new organic body based on my genetic code (with modifications and improvements of course—see Old Man’s War).

Now this song is playing in my head—King Missle’s Detachable Penis.
~~~
Ten bought me a new flavor of gummy at the weed store. It’s pineapple/habanero. All I can say is, THIS IS WHAT HEAVEN TASTES LIKE!
~~~
Trump on his second term: “You watch. It’s going to be so good. It’s going to be so much fun. It’ll be nasty a little bit at times, and maybe at the beginning, in particular," he said.

FYI, that's not a threat—it's a promise and he's delighting in it.

This was his closing vote-for-me message? I realize it hasn't occurred to the red hats that he’s telling them that they’ll also be subjugated and dehumanized in his second reign of terror and error. It won’t just be immigrants, people of color, LGBTs, women, and the disabled who will die in his camps. It’ll be everyone who doesn’t worship the ground he stumbles on, everyone who fails to agree with every diseased toad he spews from his face anus. If you’re not a fellow billionaire eager to fork over big bucks, you’re expendable. Being a white, Penis American won’t be enough—you’ll need to have Space Karen bucks and the will to spend it all on an orange painted, pants shitting, stupid as fuck, near 80 year old, racist, tantrum toddler.

Vote blue up and down the ballot if you want to live!