Getting In The Spirit

You know what Wednesday’s events puts in my mind? Yes, you guessed it, the movie Scrooged. The best part of the flick, of fucking course, is Carol Kane as the Ghost of Christmas Present

Ghost of Christmas Present : Close your eyes...! And think of snowflakes and moonbeams and whiskers on kittens...
[She notices Frank peeking and goes to jab his eyes with two fingers] 
Ghost of Christmas Present : Nooooo peeking!
[Frank blocks the jab and closes his eyes] 

Ghost of Christmas Present : Of rainbows, forget-me-nots... of misty meadows and sun-dappled pools. Oh, look! There’s Mr Hedgehog. I wonder where he’s going? Perhaps to HARLEM!
[She punches Frank] 
Frank Cross : My jaw!
Ghost of Christmas Present : Sometimes the truth is painful, Frank.
[She slaps his face] 

~~~
Ghost of Christmas Present : Oh, what is this, Frank? Oh, oh look, Frank! It’s a toaster!
[hits him in the forehead with the toaster] 
~~~
Ghost of Christmas Present : Don’t vex me Frank, or I’ll fix your mouth so it won’t hold soup.

She really had the best bits.

David Johansen as the Ghost of Christmas Past was pretty awesome too.

Frank Cross : I get it. You’re taking me back in time to show me my mother and father, and I’m supposed to get all goosey and blubbery. Well, forget it, pal, you got the wrong guy!
Ghost of Christmas Past : That’s exactly what Attila the Hun said. But when he saw his mother... Niagara Falls!
~~~
Ghost of Christmas Past : Let’s face it, Frank. Garden slugs got more out of life than you.
Frank Cross : Yeah? Name one!  

The Ghost of Christmas Future isn’t particularly memorable but I expect they had a few good lines too.

Some fun movie trivia:

Bill Murray ad-libbed most of his lines. In a 1988 interview with Philadelphia Daily News, Richard Donner discussed Murray’s penchant for improvisation and described the experience of directing Murray as follows: “It’s like standing on 42nd Street and Broadway, and the lights are out, and you’re the traffic cop.”
~~~
When Frank throws water on the waiter he sees burning, he says, “I’m sorry. You know I thought you were Richard Pryor.” This is a reference to an event in Pryor’s life when, while freebasing cocaine, accidentally set himself on fire and ran down a busy street in Los Angeles.
~~~
Carol Kane would get upset at having to “rough up” Bill Murray in their scenes together.
~~~
When the Ghost of C Present first appears in the movie, she says to Frank Cross, “I’m a little muddled.” This is a direct quote from Glinda the Good Witch in The Wizard of Oz (1939) when she first meets Dorothy in Munchkinland.

Wouldn’t it be great if Carol Kane’s scolding, pugilistic Ghost of Christmas Present visited Elon, TFG, and every goddamned CEO on this bleak, cursed, lunatic planet? I’m not religious in any way but, I could see myself getting into the Christmas spirit if it involves rich fucks getting schooled by her.