BIRFDAY!

Yesterday, it was my birthday
I hung one more year on the line
I should be depressed
My life’s a mess
But I’m having a good time
~ Paul Simon, Have a Good Time

Okay, it’s today – today is my birthday but the sentiment’s the same.

Is my life really a mess though? I’d say no more, and certainly far less of a mess than a shit-ton of other people. My health is abysmal but I’m still alive, able to enjoy cookies, the love of a very patient, good man, AND the rest of my Valhallan famiglia.

To riff on Oliver Sacks, At 11, I could say I am sodium (element 11), and now at 67, I am a Ho – i.e., holmium. 

Holmium is a rare-earth element with the atomic number 67. It has the symbol Ho.

Holmium can absorb neutrons, so it is used in nuclear reactors to keep a chain reaction under control. 

 I absorb neutrons, I contain multitudes. Apologies to old Walt there.

“Strange to be almost fifty, no? I feel like I just understood how to be young.”

"Yes! It's like the last day in a foreign country. You finally figure out where to get coffee, and drinks, and a good steak. And then you have to leave. And you won't ever be back.” 
~ Andrew Sean Greer, Less 

And here I am, just a few years shy of 70. Back in my ultra recent surgery marathon years (2020 - 2024), I honestly, seriously, and for sure thought I’d be gone by now. I mean, how many times can I get my bean and spine opened up like a can of Campbell’s soup before the old bod says ENOUGH!? How many times can I recover to the point where I can bathe, dress, and feed myself? Take a bit of daily exercise? Enjoy the company of my chosen famiglia? Read, blog, and doodle?

Luckily, the answer is more than five.

I want to grow old without facelifts... I want to have the courage to be loyal to the face I've made. Sometimes I think it would be easier to avoid old age, to die young, but then you'd never complete your life, would you? You'd never wholly know you. 
~ Marilyn Monroe 

She never got the chance to know. Monroe was 36 when she overdosed. If she had lived, she would have turned 99 this past June.

I know a few women who’ve had work done. No judgement – their bodies/their choice. If I had the spare dosh and wasn’t already being sliced open on the regular, would I have fountain of youth type work done? Doubt it. I’d rather spend my money on other things. Like what? Travel, planting forests and fields of wildflowers, cleaning up oceans, cats, medical science research shit, and a 1970 baby blue Karmann Ghia – you know, STUFF.

So, how am I celebrating my birthday? Well, it’s a gorgeous day here in Valhalla so maybe Ten and I will take a walk down to the seawall. I won’t be able to do more than that as, in a fit of exuberance, I over-exercised the other day and re-banjaxed my left foot (joy). I might sit on the porch, reading and watching the tide come in. Later, when Jen and Oni get home from work there’ll be tacos and cake. Mmmmmmmmm!