Clown's Spawn

Brainless Boebert’s idiot spawn’s at it again.

Her eldest moron, Tyler — you remember him, right? He’s the one who, at 17, knocked up his, supposedly, 15-year-old girlfriend. It seems he was either too stupid to understand the importance of condoms OR his radish brained, comically inept parents *oopsie* never gave him a heads up. Oh wait, probably both. 

Loser Lauren and her ex have the parenting skills and basic intelligence level of Homer Simpson. None of their kids stand a chance. They've been saddled with a genetic predisposition for complete clownfuck imbecility as well as their parent's infamous and firmly established white trash reputation. 

Ya know, I take it back — comparing Lauren Boebert to Homer Simpson is an insult to boneheaded, two dimensional cartoon simpletons everywhere. So unfair of me

Shit, Lauren and what’s his name make Homer look like look like a cross between Donna Reed, Atticus Finch, and Marie Curie. Maybe throw in El-Sayed as long as we’re at it.

Lauren’s oldest error, now 21, has just been busted AGAIN on multiple felony charges. What might those be? Glad you asked! Like all faithful Republicans he’s allegedly sexually exploited a child.

According to Colorado court records reviewed by American Muckrakers, case 2026CR234 was filed in Garfield County District Court on August 6, 2026. The People of the State of Colorado v. Boebert, Tyler J lists five counts:

1. Sexual exploitation of a child, induce/entice (C.R.S. 18-6-403(3)(a)), a Class 3 felony
2. Sexual exploitation of a child, possession with intent (C.R.S. 18-6-403(3)(c)), a Class 3 felony
3. Sexual exploitation of a child, video (C.R.S. 18-6-403(3)(b.5), (5)(b)(II)), a Class 4 felony
4. Contributing to the delinquency of a minor (C.R.S. 18-6-701(1)(a)), a Class 4 felony
5. Contributing to the delinquency of a minor (C.R.S. 18-6-701(1)(a)), a Class 4 felony (source) 

What’s that mean? It sounds an awful lot like this 21-year-old man, with a really bad porn ‘stache, was, at least, hitting on a school girl, trying to get her drunk, with plans to film himself (and maybe his friends) raping her.

Mind you, this latest obscenity of Toilet Head Tyler's, is on top of his 2024 arrest for “four felony counts of Criminal Possession ID Documents - Multiple Victims, one felony count of Conspiracy to Commit a Felony, and over 15 additional misdemeanor and petty offenses.” Him and his criming chums broke into cars, stole shit, including credit cards, and then used those cards at local McDonald’s (of all places!) and gas stations. He and his band of idiots were caught on camera and easily identified in part because Tyler was wearing a hoodie from his parent’s bar, Shooter’s Grill. WHAT a celery brained spoon! He’s a real chip off the old subpar Boebert block, isn’t he?

Colorado’s Republican Congresswoman Boebert spawned a repeat offending criminal and child sex abuser. How very Republican of her. I’m sure her Lord Trump will be ever so pleased … if he remembers who she is.