Not HeHe

Our little boy Cake had a doctor’s appointment on Monday. He was having some peeing problems. Poor old kitten. Poor us – there’s been lots of extra incontinence inspired laundry. 

The vet says he has a UTI (Christ almighty, I can relate to that!) and gave him a shot. Cake seems to be feeling better and isn’t leaking all over the place anymore. Yea!

Today’s my turn at the (human) vet but not for pee probs (thank Bast!). It’s, in part, a general check up with my PCP but also a what-the-mothingfucking-fuck about my seemingly never ending toe issue (my podiatrist is on vacay – I'll see him next week). The infection, after a month and a half on antibiotics, pulled a big zombie act yesterday.

I mean, what’s it gonna take to get rid of this persistent undead damned infection? Molotov cocktails? Should we nuke it from space? Do I need to fly a microscopic X-wing into it and fire proton torpedoes? I need to know!

Now then, I’ve survived eight brain surgeries, four spine ops, seven eye procedures, TONS of radiation (I swear I glow in the dark now), and have been on a chemo med for five years or so (to stabilize and possibly reduce the size of some of my tumors in order to obviate MORE surgeries) but a fucking TOE infection is gonna take me down? You’ve GOT to be fucking kidding me. Also, I don’t *think* so!

My biggest fear is that I’ll be kept in the hospital for a couple days while they pump gallons of industrial strength antibiotics into my veins and then take off my whole toenail AGAIN. Been there, done that already. Please find a new trick that works this time!

Know what the worst part of today is gonna be? Driving into downtown and paying ridiculously high parking garage rates. We’d SO take the T if I was easily mobile!

Alright, enough kvetching. Here, have some memes while I go pack an overnight bag in case the docs keep me.

Fun with Leprosy!

Hansen’s disease (AKA leprosy) is one of the least contagious of diseases. 95% of us are naturally immune and it’s not easily contracted by the other 5%.

So tell me, how was there a surge in leprosy cases in Florida in 2025? Hmmm?

Florida reported more cases of Hansen’s disease, commonly known as leprosy, in 2025 than in any other year shown in the state’s modern disease database. (source) 

Florida – of fucking course. How long before they’re hit by another round of Bubonic plague or dysentery?

Unsurprisingly, throughout history, a lot of religions considered the disease a "curse from God" rather than a medical condition. I’m sure we can all, way too easily, walk out our front doors and, within a block or two, run into at least three evangelical assholes who strongly believe that cancer, COVID, AIDS, NF2, and the runs are all punishments from their blonde Republican white god. Leprosy? Sure, why not?

Chaulmoogra oil, pressed from the seeds of a tree found in India, was the standard treatment for leprosy at the Louisiana Leper Home. It was applied either using oil soaked gauze, by injections or in pill form. Unfortunately, chaulmoogra oil gave little or no medical benefit. (source) 

Hmmmmm, sounds an awful lot like all the “cures” Republicans and other assorted quacks (Marianne Williamson, RFK jr, Dr. Oz anyone?) push for autism and what have you, doesn’t it now?

How ‘bout that horse paste, or injecting Clorox or shining lightbulbs up your ass? Isn’t that what President ClownFuck ShitForBrains recommended? Oh wait, maybe Republicans just want us all to die because, ya know, if we're poor. If we were rich, we could buy our way out of being sick so, honestly, this is our own damn fault.

😳 OOPS 😳 I’ve gone off on a rant again. Sorry. Back to Fun With Leprosy.

Scientists discovered an effective treatment in the 1940s and a cure was found 1981. Treatment can last one to two years and delaying treatment can cause permanent nerve damage and disability.

The Louisiana Leper Home in Carville, (later known as the National Leprosarium) established in 1892, was run by an order of nuns — The Daughters of Charity of St. Vincent de Paul. They housed the ill in shacks previously used by enslaved people. Leaving was not an option. This wasn’t a hospital set up, it was a jail. The crime? Being sick in a frighteningly icky way. 

There were also Leper colonies in Kalaupapa, Molokai, Hawaii and a short-lived site on Penikese Island in Buzzards Bay in  Massachusetts. 

Nuns, in case you didn't go to Catholic school and aren't in the know, have always been scary. Forget all that Sound of Music/Julie Andrews, Flying Nun/Sister Bertrille crap you've seen on teevee!

At Carville, conditions during the earliest decades were rugged. When the facility was first established in swampy, malaria-prone territory outside Baton Rouge, the afflicted were initially housed in former slave cabins, where they shivered and sweltered through the seasons. Their lives were initially bound by fences—one that divided the men's side of the campus from the women's side (since interactions between the sexes were strictly forbidden) and a tall iron perimeter fence to thwart the many escape attempts. There was even an on-site jail to punish runaways, who were sometimes brought back in leg irons. And patients had to sacrifice their very identities: Upon arrival, they were immediately encouraged to take a new name to protect their families back home from the disease's powerful stigma. (source) 

How can I get my very own personal case of leprosy?

Person-to-person

Leprosy does not spread easily between people. You must have prolonged, close contact with someone with untreated leprosy over many months to catch the disease.

Leprosy likely spreads when a person sick with the disease coughs or sneezes and a healthy person breathes in the droplets repeatedly over a long period of time.

Around 95% of people cannot get leprosy because their immune system can fight off the bacteria that causes it. It’s not spread through sex, and it is not passed to the fetus during pregnancy.

Armadillos

In the soutern United States, some armadillos are naturally infected with the bacteria that cause leprosy, and it may be possible that the animals can spread it to people. However, the risk is very low and most people who come into contact with armadillos are unlikely to get leprosy. (source)

Staying out of Florida seems to be a smart idea. If you must go, wear a mask when out in public.

Also, though armadillos are cute, it might be wise to keep a wee distance. Don’t let them sneeze on you.

I only mention it.

Escape!!!

Jen, Oni, Kevin, and I are taking a pause on I’m Dying Up Here and Mind Hunters. Why? I need straight up serious escapism – straight up/no chaser. Very kindly, they’re humoring me. Also, they like the same escapist shit as me so … we’re good.

What’s on tap?
Well, we’re just about done with the second and final season of Why Women Kill. Things look bad for Bertram, Scooter, and, possibly, Vern. Catherine’s jealous, betrayed, and heartbroken. Alma finally achieved the position in society she's long craved but AT WHAT COST?! Will Dee and Rita manage to survive? 

I believe we have one episode left.

Same with Resident Alien. That is, one to go and the the show’s over. The gang’s trying to find and eliminate the giant killer Mantid alien before it releases its egg sac and Mantids take over the Earth. Honestly, would they do any worse than humans? I’m betting Mantid leaders would be an improvement over Trump, Putin, and Netanyahu.

We’ve just started watching two new-to-us shows – Stranger Things and Good Girls.

Stranger Things – A young boy vanishes, a small town uncovers a mystery involving secret experiments, there are terrifying supernatural forces and one strange little girl. It’s a sci-fi, action, horror, drama, mystery show. This should keep us entertained. I sure as fuck was drawn in by the first ep anyway. There’s five seasons – JACKPOT!

Good Girls – Three broke, in definite need, very normal suburban moms pull off a big grocery store robbery to dodge financial ruin, help their kids, and gain independence. It seems to be the start of something big. The show is labeled crime comedy-drama. First ep was fire! Four seasons – WOO HOO!

There’s also a new season of Star Trek: Strange New Worlds fresh out. We can’t binge watch this one. RATZ! Next ep will air on Thursday so we’ll see it over the weekend. //sigh//

Occasionally, Jen and I will fire up an old Buffy ep. We watched the very creepy Hush on Saturday.

Unfortunately, I was reminded of how the annoying acting performances of a few of the actors always mars the show for me. A thought – maybe it’s not the actors. Maybe it's how they were written and/or directed?

Buffy was always truly uneven. She’d switch from vulnerable teen to confident, strong girl without missing a beat. No transition, no fade – it was as if a switch was thrown. Jarring and amateurish.

Willow – her over-the-top, socially awkward, shy sidekick shtick is just rural, midwestern, junior high level theatrics. It’s embarrassing.

Allyson Hannigan’s jejune performance as Willow was rivaled by the actor, Amber Benson, who plays her girlfriend Tara. Oh my fucking god, Tara was just beige amounts of awful. Her character’s backstory is that she was raised in a strict religious cult and is breaking free (exploring her witch talents and being a lesbian) now that she’s in college. A lot of possibilities there BUT she’s played as even more insecure, meek, and absolutely stilted than Willow ever was.

 Now, I understand that writer/director Joss Whedon was a complete prick (though I don’t know the full story, he’s been widely described as “toxic and casually cruel”) but he did write some believable, consistent women characters. Anya, Faith, and pretty much any of the other characters, within the Buffyverse, came off as real people. For that matter, alt universe Willow (also, Willow when she went to the dark side with grief) was a MUCH stronger, more realistic persona.

It seems Whedon just has/had absolutely zilcho talent for writing and bringing to the screen sensitive, socially awkward female characters. I mean, Xander wasn’t exactly a smooth, secure dude (understatement alert) but he was consistently believable. Spike had his less than smooth-guy moments but he was always credible – zero cringe. So, maybe those gawky, amateur hour performances of Hannigan and Benson’s were Whedon's doing, NOT necessarily the actor’s?

I understand that Hannigan, post Buffy, has had a successful career in both movies and teevee. Good for her. I’ve not seen anything she or Sarah Michelle Gellar have been in. This is primarily due to their projects not pulling my interest. Even if they did, I’d be reluctant to sit through performances that I figure would be uninspiring (based on past performances). 

Meh, movies aren’t cheap. 

I’m not gonna leave the house and be around a lot of people (potentially RFK jr. endorsed anti-vaxxing, disease carrying people) unless I’m pretty sure I’m gonna get my entertainment money’s worth.

It’s The Guns

In today’s episode of Idiots with a Guns we visit Lincoln, Nebraska.

An absolute radish brained dumbfuck managed to shoot himself while he was making a film of himself showing how to use a gun (for YouTube? TicToc? Instagram? Some other online video look-at-me shit?).

His girlfriend was doing the recording when this total smooth brained spoon, in trying to demonstrate how to rack his newly bought handgun, shot himself in the leg. Dodo-head severed his femoral artery. FYI, those babies are gushers. He could only have fucked up more by shooting himself in the face.

I only mention it BUT, since the gun he was using for his failed demo was brand-y new and modern handguns have built-in blocks that stop accidental shooting unless you pull the trigger, this means that our nitwitted, galumphing instructional video star pulled the trigger on a loaded gun that was aimed at his own leg.

Bright young man, eh? Hope the girlfriend’s on some serious birth control.

Next we visit Apalachee, Georgia where the Apalachee High School shooter’s father has just been sentenced to 15 years in jail.

Colin Gray gave his son an assault rifle for Christmas. 

He did this just a few short months after cops came to his door to inform him that his precious boy had threatened to shoot up an elementary school. 

What can you expect from an idiot sperm donor who names his progeny after a fucking gun company. Yeah, he named that boy Colt.

Fucking Colin knew his 14-year-old (now 16 and in jail for life, no parole) was obsessed with mass murders. 

Of course Fucking Colin bought his deranged spawn an assault rifle. The man doesn’t have the brain god gave a housefly. He’s such an imbecile, he probably needs a reminder to wipe himself after he takes a dump.

Quote by John Fugelsang 

Dude absolutely TOTALLY deserves this sentence. I’m just disappointed that he only got 15 years (he was up against a far more appropriate 100 years). Fucking Colin was found guilty of 27 counts, including second-degree murder, involuntary manslaughter, cruelty to children in the second degree, and reckless conduct. I wonder if one of the counts was accessory to murder – he was def an accessory before the fact.

Now we’re down in Austin, Texas.

His name was Anthoneil Williams II He was a 17-year-old kid. He was killed by Austin police after he called 911. 

Three cops fired more than a dozen shots into the boy, claiming they thought his water bottle was a gun. They reloaded and shot again. Austin police chief Lisa Davis has said that she determined the call came from the teen's cellphone and called the whole business "potentially a suicide by police.” 

The footage seemingly shows Williams show up, sit down on a line of limestone bricks for five minutes before officers arrive just after 4 a.m. last Friday.

Williams then retreats behind the playscape. Officers did not have their weapons drawn on approach but quickly drew them when Williams' hand seemingly moved toward his waistband. Williams falls to the ground after a volley of more than a dozen shots from at least one officer. He's seen moving behind the playscape, and two officers fire on him again while he is on the ground.

By 4:02 a.m., at least two officers can be seen reloading their guns as the video ends. (source) 

He didn’t have an assault weapon or a handgun in the waistband of his pants. It was a water bottle.

If the boy was white would he be alive and would the cops have taken him to McDonald’s for an Egg McMuffin and hash browns on their way to the hospital for his mental health care?

Black boys deserve to grow up to be Black men. Dammit.

Oh yeah and there’s yesterday’s mass murder at the Twin Falls, Idaho In-N-Out Burger. Three people are dead, seven more were injured. The gunman killed himself (so that makes four dead) so that saves Idaho the cost of trials and housing him in jail for the rest of his life. Small favors. Why’d he do it? Was he after one person in particular or was this just an orgasm of death? Too soon to know.
 

Witch Hunts and Japanese River Otters

Seems to me the whole foofaraw over Dr. Fauci boils down to this – he was a profoundly competent, caring, determined physician-scientist and immunologist trying to stem the spread COVID and that made Trump look bad. WHY? Because Pedo's very being makes him look bad. Trump exists therefore he is rotten, sleazebagian, and the complete picture of failure.

Fauci was working for this complete, nimrodian buffoon of a clown-ass president who cared more about his precious makeup being smudged by a mask then about the people of this country dying. Pedo wants/needs to shift the blame for his own GINORMOUS failures. He’s out for revenge and his renfieldian handmaidens are all “yes Master, we’ll destroy your enemy for you!” 

Reality? Facts? Phhhhht! Immaterial!

FYI, Fauci didn’t create SARS-CoV-2. He didn’t order it up from some lab in China and he’s NOT responsible for the higher death rates amongst Republicans after the vaccine came out. Trump did that. He killed his own people.

MAGAts, the right-wing, the GOP, they’re just NOT good at accepting reality or taking responsibility for their own actions.

Anyway, the Fauci witch hunt has ignited a few good Threads. One, last night, was truly inspired. Here are some excerpts:

Like many, I got the Covid shot at Dr Fauci’s urging. At first it was fine - my arm was sore but no big deal. The following day was when it finally happened - I turned into a Japanese River Otter for several hours. The situation thankfully reversed itself but I did not emerge unscathed - my skin hisses and smokes when near holy relics and I can generate codes for Windows 95 at will. Ten days after receiving the shot…I died. I am here, 5 years later, still dead. Thanks a lot, Dr Fauci.
~ ahistoryofghostsmusic AKA Dan Reifsnyder 

All I got was a sticker.
~ catspolitics

I got my vaccine and the boosters and now I’m SIX YEARS OLDER!
~ selizk

I’m pretty sure all who followed vaccine protocol died in June of this year. So this must be the zombie apocalypse.
~ singin_thru_life_913

To which docdooksie replied:
I’ve been a Zombie since June. It’s not so bad, no one bothers me when I go grocery shopping and the butcher keeps me in brains. And men Zombies… no need for testosterone shots … nudge, nudge, wink, wink.

I’ve gotten the shot every year since 2020 and each time I’ve gotten one degree closer to Kevin Bacon. We’re basically married now.
~ petro6866

I got a nifty prehensile tail that gives added range to the 5g transmitter that was in the second shot.
~ chris.higgins.fairview

If you remain a transmogrified, deceased aquatic creature for more than 30 days, you may be entitled to compensation.
~ todd.south
***THIS IS AN ADVERTISEMENT FOR LEGAL SERVICES***

I’m so disappointed. I got my Covid shot and all the boosters but never got the added benefits I was told I would get! I expected 5G, telekinesis, being magnetic, weird growths, death. I got nothin.
~ julieann.718

This also happened to me. I got the shot and immediately became a Japanese River Otter for approximately 13 hours. After that, I woke up inside a huge bowl of soup at a tavern in the mid 1800s. I lost my pants in that soup, and my legs had a rash. I went to sleep on a noodle, and when I woke up I was back in my regular life and everything was normal except that I swear profusely in Arabic. Dr Fauci is responsible for this.
~ heatherschiederillustrates_

After the first series of 2 Covid shots, my gender changed against my will. I was a 6’5”, 260 pound man, now I’m a 5’2” 130 pound woman. I can’t even grow a decent beard.
~ friendostradick

I took the Fauci shot and it immediately turned me into a worm. Fortunately, my husband was there to scoop me up and prove to me that he would, in fact, love me even if I was a worm. He kissed my wormy head (or was it my bum? I’ll never tell) and at true love’s kiss the Fauci curse was broken and I transformed back into a real human woman.
~ juliaswriter

Poster dead_duck_2 replied with “same,” kindly validating her experience.

For approximately four hours I could hear the thoughts of squirrels. It wasn’t useful. They were almost entirely about acorns, personal grudges, and what they described as “the coming of the Great Blue Jay.” Then, at precisely 2:17 the following afternoon, I became legally recognized by three different geese as one of their own. One of them kept trying to explain local goose politics, but I don’t speak enough Honk to follow parliamentary procedure. But no lasers. Thanks, Obama.
~ ellenhar1

Lucky. All I got was Vista and a few minutes as a gerbil.
~ baronessgg

Woman Hating Freaks of the GOP

An extremely important lesson that all women should know and have learned by now is that we must be extra special wary, vigilant, and hyper alert around Republican men. These are not safe people. OBVS!  

• There’s Prez Grab 'Em By The Pussy and his myriad rapes, assaults, and persistent pedophilia.
• How ‘bout War Crimes Secretary Pete Kegseth and the woman he drugged, raped, and then tried to pay off? At the time (of the rape), Hegseth was still legally married to his second wife and had recently welcomed a child with the woman who would become his third. Ultra charitably speaking, that man's a complete, unsalvageable toxic waste dump.
• Remember Roy Moore, the former Alabama Supreme Court Chief Justice, Senate candidate, pedophile, and serial sexual assaulter? 
• Tony Gonzales the Texas House rep who harassed and bullied one of his aides into having an affair with him. Regina Santos-Aviles went on to commit suicide by self-immolation. That says a LOT about Tony, doesn't it? In April he was accused by a second former staffer of the same kind of harassment. He sent sexually explicit text messages (dick pics? No doubt!), relentlessly begged for sex and nude photos and was not taking no for an answer. Gonzales is married and has SIX children. I'd call him a disgusting pig but that'd be an unfair and gross insult to disgusting swine.
• Former Florida rep Matt Gaetz and the 17-year-old girl he sex trafficked. Prez Pedo NATURALLY wanted to make this kid raper and pimp attorney general.
• And who could ever forget Madison Cawthorn of North Carolina? We do try though.

This brings us to Ohio congressman Max Miller. 

For variety’s sake, young Max stands accused of domestic violence. No sex harassment or rape accusations … so far. Max’s accusers are serious Republicans – no Dems in sheep’s clothing. His ex-wife is the daughter of Republican US senator for Ohio Bernie Moreno. His ex-girlfriend, Stephanie Grisham, was White House press secretary during Prez FuckFace’s first administration. These aren’t closet Bernie Bros or Jasmine Crockett fans. 

In one alleged incident, Miller “took hot water from a pan he had just cooked eggs in and threw it at me”, Moreno testified earlier this year amid a defamation lawsuit Miller filed against her. Moreno has also accused Miller of holding a gun to her head, the New York Times reported. The pair married in 2022.
~~~
Separately, Miller’s former girlfriend Grisham… has also accused him of abuse, an allegation he has denied. Grisham and Miller dated from 2019 to 2020.

In a 2021 Washington Post op-ed, Grisham – without naming Miller – wrote about a relationship that “turned abusive”, and of a former partner who was “physical” with her. Although she did not identify Miller in the article, he said it was widely understood that the op-ed referred to him. She later confirmed she was talking about Miller, according to the Times. (source)

Ted Littleford

The fool outed himself. He’s not just an emotionally unstable, woman hating, desperately insecure rage junky, he’s a fool and an incompetent crimer. Like Gym (Rape, what rape?) Jordan, he represents the state of Ohio.

Ya know what other deeply mercurial, desperately awkward, avaricious, and quite likely suffering from a lifelong dissociative identity disorder, power chaser is from Ohio? Yep, you guessed it – JDouche Vance.

I'm really, honestly beginning to wonder if some witch, or other assorted magical being, has put a curse on Ohio. I mean, what else can explain such a concentration of vile politicians?

Back to Max Miller, the “allegedly” boiling water tossing, gun to the wife’s head Republican house rep from Ohio’s 7th District though. A restraining order filed was yesterday:

…. Moreno's restraining order alleged that Miller "harassed," "threatened," and "placed his hands on" her attorney. The restraining order also stated that Miller's own attorney said the lawmaker "just can't control himself." (source) 

Dude’s in smacked up, methed out, rabid wildebeest territory here and on the taxpayer’s dime too. He’s now “allegedly” physically attacking his ex-wife’s lawyer?! Max is FUCKED UP!

The half dozen sex criming freaks (plus Max) that I’ve listed above, are just recent examples of what the GOP, the party of family values, offer Americans.

Now, I’m in NO way saying that the Democrats are pure as the driven snow BUT at least we get rid of our violent, criminal dirtbags. We don’t elect them president. Also, when we discover their crimes we make sure they understand that staying in office is NOT an option (Hi Eric!). That's IF they’ve made it that far. Just ask Graham Platner. 

Distraction Theater

Christopher Weyant

Who needs who more?

Trump wanted to play big dictator tough guy with Iran — outdo Obama’s deal in a big, thunder and brimstone show of he-man bombing. He's bombing alright.

It’s testosterone theater – overcompensation for his obvious, massive insecurities. Also a distraction from all things Epstein, those pesky ICE murderers, bombing Venezuelan fishermen, financial crimes, and other assorted failures, felonies, and idiocies.

Bibi needed U.S. money, bombs, and rep in order to go after the folks he wanted to attack anyway. Why hit Iran (besides the fact that he’s never met a mass murder he didn’t fall in love with immediately)? Maybe to distract from his ongoing corruption trials and the ICC's arrest warrant for war crimes and crimes against humanity. Plus there’s an election coming in October. Old Beeb’s popularity, like Prez Pedo’s, is on the wane. Netanyahu is still a hit with Israel’s version of MAGA, nationalist religious factions, and general right-wingers though.

Brandan Reynolds

Like Prez Fuckface, Beebs needs a boost. Pathetically (hilariously?), he thinks visiting the U.S., being seen with the world’s biggest no-talent chiseling fuck-up is gonna give him some shine. WOW! That’s some serious clue-free delusion, mes amis.

On top of that:

“Netanyahu arrives in Washington at a time when even many around [Trump] are suspicious of him. He has become toxic in the US,” Ahron Bregman, an Israeli security analyst and senior teaching fellow in the Department for War Studies at King’s College London. “He is regarded in the US – rightly or wrongly – as the one who dragged Trump into a war of choice that has turned into a strategic catastrophe. Nobody, not even Trump, will let him pretend to be the cleverest guy in the room. Those days are gone.” (source) 

Bibi’s not popular in the U.S. and Trump’s not popular in the world at large. These two are grade A toxic twins.

Did you read that Trump and his greasy, deeply twisted War Crimes Secretary dropped more bombs on Iran last night? They killed six people including three civilians – a couple and their two-year-old kid. Still proud to be an American? Rah, rah, rah?

Bill Bramhall

Meanwhile, here in the Disunited Kakistocratic Plutocracy of America, Republican’s war on Black voters in the south doesn’t appear to be going quite as smoothly as they’d expected. Perhaps, when Trump’s pet Supreme Court torpedoed the Voting Rights Act, they actually shot him and his party of shortsighted, bigoted imbeciles in the foot?

A new analysis of Black voters in the south indicates that Republican attempts to dilute their political power is driving them to the polls in larger numbers and shifting their counties further left.
~~~
The analysis by VoteHub, a data-focused election organization, indicates that the efforts have only motivated Black voters in the 78 Black belt counties it tracked. All but one shifted left in partisan turnout compared with 2024. Further, majority-Black counties that voted after Louisiana v Callais, the landmark supreme court decision that triggered the Republican-led redistricting efforts, had a surge in voter participation. 
~~~
In nearby Louisiana, Black voters made up 35.7% of the primary electorate, despite making up only 32.1% of the population. The state experienced increased voter turnout across partisan groups and race, but 30.9% of Black voters cast ballots in the primary election – 3.2 points more than white voters. (source) 

A return to Jim Crow is NOT a lock!

Here’s something really great though – I had THE most amazing sandwich last night. It was a Tomato Caprese – fresh mozzarella, vine ripe tomato, pesto, roasted peppers, basil and olive oil on marble rye. OH MY FUCKING GOD! 

Astoundingly I was able to control myself and only ate half. I’ll have the other half for breakfast this morning.

Some days all it takes is the small things – like a brilliant sandwich –  to get me charged up and ready to face the day’s battles. 

Fun with Aging

Another day, another doctor appointment. This morning’s my annual with the throat doc/surgeon. Apparently these stupid, pesky tumors can cause issues with my vocal cords, give me breathing challenges (motherfucking *joy*), and make it more common for me to choke on my food or drink. What FUN!

Growing old is like being increasingly penalized for a crime you haven't committed.
~ Pierre Teilhard de Chardin

Vegetables are a must on a diet. I suggest carrot cake, zucchini bread and pumpkin pie.
~ Jim Davis

In this time of Taylor Farms (and all their aliases) sparked volcanically explosive excreta, we gotta get our veggies in the safest possible places. I ALWAYS trust carrot cake!

FYI:

"Taylor Farms donated millions to President Trump, met privately with the White House the night the FDA identified their lettuce as the source of this outbreak, and then reportedly tried to distance themselves from this outbreak," Garcia said.  (source)

Pay off the Republicans – the Party in power – so you don’t have to spend an extra penny to make sure your product won’t poison people? Welcome to the plutocracy mes amis !

Age is a high price to pay for maturity.
~ Tom Stoppard

Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen.
~ Mark Twain

Christopher Weyant 

So, being born physically old and presumably decrepit and then gradually unaging — becoming youthful and more healthy? As far as intelligence and emotional maturity go, how would this work? I don’t want to have the frailty of an 80-year-old with the emotional capacity of a toddler and the intelligence to match. I mean, fer fuck’s sake, we see how 80 with the brain of a tantrum toddler plays out on the news every day. It’s ugly, it stinks, and ruins everything it come in contact with.

Nope, if I’m gonna start out life old and age down to 18, I want all the knowledge, wisdom, and emotional intelligence an undamaged, smart 80-year-old might have and I want to retain that as I reverse age.

I want to have enough confidence in myself in my 20s to make bolder moves — to be less hobbled by fears and insecurities. e.g., GO to that band’s loft party where I only know the bass player. GO to the club to see that awesome band’s final show. STICK with that grad level ceramic chemistry class and see where it takes me. MOVE to Berlin to paint for a year.

Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life.
~ H. H. Asquith

Matisse, The Italian Woman

Beautiful young people are accidents of nature, but beautiful old people are works of art.
~ Eleanor Roosevelt 

I’m waiting for my “work of art” phase to kick in. Maybe I need another year?

Old age ain't no place for sissies.
~ Bette Davis

Satchel Paige asked “How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?”

Over the past six years my body’s been telling me I’m ancient. There are mummies in Egypt in better shape than me. Coco and Rocco’s cremated little corpses have more energy. I’ve had godforsaken, ramshackle-ass, raggedy zombies stop and tell me to get my shit together — “comb that hair! Stand up straight! Stop wearing sweatpants!” It’s embarrassing. Truly.

My mind’s telling me I’m still vibrant. Maybe more so than ever. Given my physical limitations, I’m as creative as I can be and I’m def continuing to learn new interesting shit all the time. So … brain good. Maybe this is dementia though, huh?

I’ve certainly embraced my don’t give a fuck years. Maybe “don’t give a fuck” would, more or less, define much of the second half of my life though. I’ve gained a modicum of diplomacy in my communications and delivery (SHUT UP, I have SO!) and also achieved the ability to create and hold personal boundaries, even when that makes me sad. Holding boundaries that make me sad is the adult version of eating all my peas because they’re good for me and will make me big and strong. //sigh//

I intend to live forever. So far so good.
~ Steven Wright