Well, THAT was interesting

On Tuesday I saw my awesome neurologist, Doc Plotkin. I naively thought I’d sorta, kinda have a break from the eye woes as this appointment was regarding my latest spine MRI.

Nope. Ya see, Doc P’s a full service Neurofibromatosis Type Two minder. My eye difficulties came as a result of the surgeries needed for dealing with that motley collection of neuromas and meningiomas (AKA tumors) I’ve harbored over the years. The eyes are related to the neuro shit so, yeah, he’s tuned in.

This is a good thing. Duh.
He strongly suggested that i seriously look into getting a PROSE lens which would obviate further surgery AND the loss of my damn eye. What’s a PROSE lens? Prosthetic Replacement of the Ocular Surface Ecosystem – it looks like a BIG contact lens.

The goals of BostonSight PROSE treatment are to:

• Reduce symptoms and support healing by restoring a healthy ocular surface environment
• Improve blurry vision by masking surface corneal irregularities and transmitting a sharp image to the back of the eye
• Prevent damage by protecting the cornea against the environment and eyelids

So, this could be WAY great.

With this info in hand yesterday, I went to my scheduled appointment with the eye surgeon. My understanding was that I needed a quickie surgery to close up the eyelid a little so as to protect my cornea.

I’ve had this done before. WHY do I need it done again? Skin is plastic. As time passes, it stretches. It sags. Shit doesn’t stay in the same place, particularly with the goddamned vicissitudes of aging.

In any case, the surgeon said he could do it THAT VERY DAY which instilled  a bit of panic (I require a couple days of mental prep, time to get all steely and shit, before a scalpel wielding cutter comes at me. Ya know?). AND then, he let me know that he’d have to close up my eye a LOT more than he’d done previously.

I asked him to draw me a pic of what he meant. Well shit, the orb would be all but closed. PANIC-CITY! He allowed that the process IS reversible. I could have my eye back in full action once the cornea had healed.

OK, fine but will this get in the way of me being kitted out with the PROSE lens?

Oh, he thanked me for reminding him of that. Yes, what he proposed WOULD make the PROSE impossible.

So, the appointment ended without surgery…FOR NOW. I’ll see a cornea doc on Friday who will be able to tell me whether I’m a candidate for the fancy, special lens or not. IF not, I’ll have eye closing surgery on Monday.

Here’s the other thing I need. Time to plan AND collect an interesting collection of eye patches. Ya know, in addition to the standard pirate patch, I’ll need some groovy patterned patches, cool colors, one that’ll make me look Borg-esque OR Terminator-ish and, OF COURSE, statement patches for when I go to protests (FUCK TRUMP and the whole enabling Republi/Fascist party – would that fit on an eye patch, ya think?).

If I’m gonna be, essentially, one eyed for some long stretch of time, I TOTES need time to get all fashion forward with this shit.

Ya know?