Steam Vent

Pressure, pushing down on me
Pressing down on you, no man ask for
Under pressure, that burns a building down

We’re all under pressure. I can’t think of a soul who’s not.

While not so much the paragon of Zen calm in handling stressful work environments, I did manage to learn a few things over the years (thank dog for personal evolution!).

Having a major crab fest about your boss, the one who just gave you 12 more orders to process despite the fact that you’re already totally under water, or about that mega annoying co-worker, is all well and fine. Needed even. Steam must be blown off lest we explode, taking out half of downtown Boston with us.

Do it outside of work and only with your peers though.

Why?

Outside of work because, boyhowdy, wouldn’t it just blow major chunks if your boss overheard you slagging him as an out of touch, brain dead, old goat -- n'cest pas?

Why only with folks on your same/similar level within the organization? It’s about morale and it’s about not undermining the confidence your employees might have in you.

When a manager goes on a whine-a-thon to one of his/her subordinates about his own responsibilities, bosses and/or fellow employees, a chain reaction occurs. Confidence in that manager/supervisor’s abilities wane, faith in the company as a whole drops, élan takes wing, morale starts looking for the back door AND this spreads. It goes viral. Employees chat. They notice things. Gossip may be the very soul of humanity.

Plus, your employees are, basically, a captive audience. It’s an abuse of position to derive your workplace emotional support from the folks whose employment depends on you.

As for the worker bee -- you’re having a bad day and need a whinge-a-thon? Snag a friend and head to The Diesel Cafe for a cuppa and billiards. Hit the Washington Square Tavern for a veggie burger and a shot of Lagavulin (neat, thanks).

This is way different from registering complaints.

You’ve a nit to pick, a grouse, something you want/need changed so that you can perform your tasks more smoothly/with less annoyance? By all means, talk to your supervisor or boss!

 I had one co-worker and, later, manager who was the absolute apex of smart grace under pressure.  On one occasion, when an external customer was giving her an especially hard time/was being thoroughly unreasonable and excessive in their demands, I expected to hear a grumble, a carp, a knock, possibly a slight quibble or polite protest. Nope. Ever the Professional Warrior Business Queen, Lily gave a slim sigh and, in response to my ‘wow, these folks are nuts!’ pronounced ‘No they’re not. They’re just putting us through our paces.’

She rocked this calm, magnanimous tone with internal customers as well. When she was the Human Resources Manager, and I was the Training Empress, she’d get daily calls from one of the department managers. He phoned to complain, whine even, about this employee or that, this client or another, to beef about new policies and old. He was blowing off steam mostly -- not so much hunting for solutions.

Sure, it was annoying but she would calmly listen, make suggestions, listen some more and then ask directed questions which helped the manager expand his thinking on the squawk du jour. And she never complained to us about him.

Lily's superpowers clearly included compassion, clarity and focus. I want to be her when I grow up.

I inherited that manager's calls after she moved on and tried to follow in her footsteps. While I never attained her level of Kung Fu HR Therapist, I think I did OK.