Whisky Tango Foxtrot!

Yesterday, at an obscenely early morning hour, Jen and Oni boarded their westward flight to visit his brother Kevin.  So early, I wasn’t even up yet. I KNOW! Too damn early. Yes, I def miss their company like mad (who will I watch sci fi shows with? who will I share meals and convo with? if the damn sun ever comes out, WHO will sit on the porch reading with me?!) but there’s something else. They take care of me when I’m illin.’ They helped me take care of The Amazing Bob. They support me through unforeseen disasters.

They’re gone just a week. No big. Nothing untoward’s gonna happen. Right? Wrong.

Now, this totally isn’t a big – it’s just annoying as all motherfucking hell and painful. After feeding the cats, loading the dishwasher and doing some light tidying, I ran smack blam into a UTI.

• Burning sensation during urination?
• Frequent urination?

Yes, you, my sweet self, have a urinary tract infection. *groan*sigh*ARGH* I’ve had these before so, right off, I recognized the bastardly bastard for what it was.

What to do? What to do?

• Drink a LOT of water.
• Heating pad action on the mid-section.
• Drink an ocean of cranberry juice. (none in the house. DRAT!)
• Do NOT hold out – pee when you gotta pee! (yeah, like my bladder’s giving me a choice)

These tips are all well and splendid BUT not a cure – just sympton mitigation. Given how common these fuckers are amongst the female of species, isn’t there an over the counter cure by now? There SO should be. I texted a couple friends – they didn’t know.

This was Saturday so my primary care doc’s office was shut. I bundled myself into Bix and motored up to the MGH ER – hoping to high hell, I wouldn’t lose it in transit. I did but not while sitting in Bix, thank Bast!

I would’ve been embarrassed – sodden stinky mess that I was – standing at the intake counter of the ER, but I was in pain AND I wouldn’t even BE in the ER if I was all smoothly contained, my usual continent self. Next issue, deafness – that is, I needed to instruct the nice but not terribly savvy counter folk on how to communicate with a deafie. I needed to do this while in mondo discomfort and rockin’ thoroughly saturated yoga pants.

I only mention it but, this is a major, big city hospital – it's odd that intake workers in the ER don't know how to communicate with someone who doesn't use the same language.

Eventually I scored an exam room where I could wait. A VERY nice young man (a tech? a PA? a nurse? *shrugs*) stopped in. He brought me a johhny so I could clean up and get out of my ruined pants AND he was ASL fluent! Jaymes said that he could ‘terp for me if needed. What a tremendous sweetheart! He wasn’t my only ASL option either – the PA who did most of my exam and eval, rolled in a cart. MGH does a FaceTime sort of a hook up with the ‘terps. Very cool.

Eventually the medics checked me out and tests were done. YUP, Uniform Tango India. For future reference, there’s no over the counter fix for this. Antibiotics are needed. I was glad to know that, at least, I hadn’t overreacted by hitting the ER.

Next time, and of course there will be a next time, I need to chill out and get OK with asking for help. You know, a lift to the hospital or doctor’s office would’ve been great. Paula, friend AND employer lives nearby – she could’ve brought me in and stayed with me there. Jen’s sister Erin could’ve buzzed me into MedicLand. As it is, her wonderful husband made the pharmacy run for me so's I could stay home by the W.C.

Also, there’s one of those neighborhood health centers just one small block away from Valhalla – could I have gotten help there? I’m gonna swing by and ask.

Why do I never have these little disasters during 9-5 weekday biz hours? Also too, why do I have a hard time asking for non-Jen and Oni help?