Screw You, Hypnos!

Regarding my ability to snag a solid 40 winky-winks – the world’s conspiring against me.

How so?

C’mon this is an easy one – the damn news.

The funniest teaser headline I’ve seen lately:

Huckabee Sanders Forcibly Separated From Her Dinner

The owner said she and Sanders stepped outside, where Wilkinson explained that her establishment has “certain standards that I feel it has to uphold, such as honesty, and compassion and cooperation.”

YES! More of THIS please!!!

Apparently Sanders' christian-kindness-for-me-but-not-for-thee Daddy saw this, his daughter’s righteous humiliation, as a grand opportunity to ratchet his already insane hypocrisy levels up to level 357. Cool and totes legal to refuse service to someone they don’t like but *GASP* *HORRORS* I’m a Bigoted-Christianist-WHITE American – we’re a protected class, you know!

Heh. Fuck you. No.

Immigration detainees (AKA asylum seekers and other tired, poor huddled masses who are just yearning to breathe free, dammit), are being housed at an understaffed, dangerous, high security prison in the Mojave Desert without access to the world outside or attorneys (though the ACLU is on the case). It seems Trump/Republican policy is to disappear, or try to disappear, pesky insufficiently worshipful humans.

Meanwhile the none-too-bright, iniquitous House Republican assholes have passed a ruthless and depraved farm bill which eviscerates food assistance for working families.

The House bill includes new sweeping, aggressive work requirements, despite the fact that current SNAP law already has work requirements in place and the majority of families receiving benefits are employed.

I need to calm down. I will.

Despite another day of Good Doobyness, I could NOT fall asleep last night. Today, I’ll attempt a double, maybe triple, workout. Ya know, wear myself out so’s I can drop off to Dreamsville without a fight tonight.

Know what else I need? Flying monkeys. They worked for the Wicked Witch, right? I bet I’d be a MUCH better boss. I’d, like, let them have smoke breaks, two days off in a row EVERY single week, there’d be birthday cakes, Pizza Tuesdays AND maybe even a 401k!

Yeah, flying monkeys would love me.

Packs of wild panthers, sleekly prowling the neighborhood – I want those too.

They’d SO be a big improvement to any environ, don'cha think?! First off, they’re attractive as fuck – like Ava Gardner with muscles. Plus, I think they eat bigots for breakfast. I read that somewhere. You did too, right?

Anotha thing, after my BIG-ass workout, I may just break down, pick up some calorie-rich veggie tempura, pop Wings of Desire (LOVE that movie) into the movieola machine and do some level 50 chilling.

Yup. That’s a plan.

My miniature panther