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Wednesday, July 17, 2019

I'm melting!

That witch with all the adorbs flying monkees? She was going all liquescent NOT because the wicked Dorothy doused her with a bucket of water – nope. It’s because D forgot the ice cubes.

Clear skies and 75º here in Valhalla at the mo. This, this here, is perfect. Sadly, we won’t stay here. Supposed to hit 90 and then, over the weekend it’ll be close to 100º.  This is Boston not Phoenix so WHAT the ever lovn’ fuck!

Ah but it’s mid-July and these painful temps will pass soon.

Funny/not funny, Ten’s from the high deserts of Oregon. The obscene temps are nothing to him. All he needs to sleep well is a little fan. Me? I need industrial strength AC – ya know, the kind that’ll simulate late autumn in Alaska.

I believe I’ll throw an extra quilt on his side of the bed tonight and crank the AC up to Arctic levels.   

It was the type of day that could wilt a metal gatepost.
~ Colin Cotterill, Thirty-Three Teeth

It was one of those nights hen the air is blood-temperature and it's impossible to tell where you leave off and it begins.
~ Elaine Dundy, The Dud Avocado 

There ar two suns today. See!
 If I don't make it to heaven, at least I know what hell feels like with this heat!
~ April Mae Monterrosa 

The shell is trying to catch a passing breeze.
The most obnoxious thing in the world is to listen to others drone on about how much they love the heat.

I leaned over to one woman at the café, who was professing how at home she was in the sweltering rot of hell, and said, “If you enjoy the heat so much, marry it, honeymoon with it, and throw it off a cliff, to spare the rest of us the agony of having to listen to the joy of your wretched matrimony.”

She laughed.

I was completely serious.
~ Michelle Franklin

I was used to heat but this place was so dry the trees were bribing the dogs.
~ Irvine Welsh, If You Liked School, you’ll Love Work

Williamsburg was stifling, narcotized by the heat.
~ Chaim Potok, The Promise

I am cruel thirsty this hot weather…. Nothing makes me so excessively peevish as hot weather.
~ Jonathan Swift

What dreadful hot weather we have! It keeps one in a continual state of inelegance.
~ Jane Austen, letter to Cassandra, 1796 September 18th 

FYI, Satan called. He wants his weather back.

2 comments:

  1. The most obnoxious thing in the world is to listen to others drone on about how much they love the heat.

    This is so true. In Portland you hear it all the time, maybe because the real heat is only for a relatively short part of the year.

    Satan called. He wants his weather back.

    Maybe we should just start referring to global warming as "Hellification".

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. > the real heat is only for a relatively short part of the year.

      And THIS is why you move there (or New England)! If I loved the heat I would've stayed in Texas.

      Also, I think it'd be accurate to describe the current WH resident's reign of error and terror as the Hellification of America.

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