Hyphenate American

In this country American means white. Everybody else has to hyphenate.
~ Toni Morrison

Why the fuck is this? Sure, there are white folks who proudly self-ID as Irish, German or Italian American but it seems that it’s only BIPOC who, as a matter of course, have qualifiers in front of American.

Native American, African American, Chinese Americans, Mexican Americans, etc.

Considering the location of the six cradles of civilization, Egypt, Mesopotamia (Iraq and Iran), the Indus Valley (Pakistan and Afghanistan), China, Mexico and Peru AND the fact that us human types are astro-promiscuous, would it not be easier and more accurate, to refer to our fellow citizens as, simply, American? Are you RILLY trying to announce a person's ancestry OR is something else afoot, hmmmm?

Also, the vast majority of us are just plain old mutts and that’s awesome+. Just think of all exotic tales we each have buried in our blood. I’d truly love to do one of those Ancestry things BUT:

1. I’m not curious enough to part with the cabbage.
2. Despite their security claims, I just don’t feel comfortable giving all my personal info and saliva to some corporation.
3. I already know that the family disease, NF2, came into la famiglia, four or six generations past, via some French dude.

The rest of my family history is just intriguing (for me) story time fodder. I’m a little bit German, Scots, French, Irish and Italian – a mutt like most Americans.

My friend Jim is Black. That doesn’t mean he’s specifically, immediately African American. His mother’s family came to the US from Jamaica. His father’s fam immigrated from Dominica. Jim was born in Pittsburgh. He is an American.

Lida’s people are from the Colville Reservation in NE Washington state as well as the Yellow River Basin area of China. She was born in Houston. Lida is Brown and she is an American.

Pal Tim’s relations are Seminole, Apache, German and Dutch. He was born in Boston. Tim is Brown and he is an American.

Jean’s ancestors came from Senegal, Ghana and Cameroon. She’s Black and was born in Brooklyn. Jean’s an American.

Aren’t we all Americans? Aren’t we all mutts? Yes. Yes we motherfucking are.

Ya know what? I believe these disastrously fucked in the head Karens (a title which can be applied equally to Vagina and Penis Americans) who abuse the cops by calling them on BIPOC should be hyphenated. They’ll now be known as Karen-Americans.

A small selection:

• Central Park Karen
• I Feel Threatened Karen
• Pool Karen
• Permit Karen   

As you grow older, you’ll see white men cheat black men every day of your life, but let me tell you something and don’t you forget it—whenever a white man does that to a black man, no matter who he is, how rich he is, or how fine a family he comes from, that white man is trash.
~ Harper Lee, To Kill a Mockingbird