A Gormless Gnome

Actual photograph of Governor Gnome
 sans makeup, botox and
surgical enhancements.

Serial animal shooter, Kristi Gnome, has been banned from another two Indian reservations in South Dakota—the state from which she proudly and stupidly lies about, amongst other things, meeting (or snubbing) foreign heads of state.

The latest bans add to existing exclusions from four other reservations this year. Ms Noem is now banned from nearly one-fifth of state territory. (source)

Currently she’s extremely unwelcome on the lands of the Yankton Sioux, Sisseton-Wahpeton Ovate, Oglala, Rosebud, Cheyenne River and Standing Rock Sioux tribes. Nice work, you walking, talking, embodiment of deranged imbecilic hatred.

Question—why would a North Korean dictator or a French President be at all interested in meeting with a skank-ass governor of a state whose entire population (909,824) is smaller than that of most U.S. major cities?
Answer—they weren’t and aren’t. The tribes in her own damn state have ixnayed her—they don't want to listen to her bullshit. Why would anyone else want to spend time in her company?

I only mention it, fabulating one’s ass off about easily fact-checked things is obvs standard operating procedure for Republicans, but it doesn’t necessarily play well with voters. I mean, we’ll see come November when/if she loses the governor’s race to a piece of jam smeared burnt toast that’s fallen jelly side down onto a dirty kitchen floor.

One thing’s clear to me, she’ll never be the running mate for Von ShitzInPantz and she never would have been. She sucks up too much precious attention and we all know that Cheato doesn’t like to share his spotlight. He wants some sycophantic, nobody-adjacent Renfield (like Pence but even more spineless) who the press will mostly ignore. Also, it’s gotta be a Penis American. For as much Captain Combover likes to grab pussy, he really doesn’t like or respect women AT ALL. Unless he’s being spanked by one…I guess.

I wonder if Fibber McGnome now regrets having had all that plastic surgery to look more like Ivanka. Fibber seems pretty delusional—maybe it hasn’t yet occurred to her that she's overplayed her pathetically meager, hateful hand.