Obsessed with Parthenogenesis

Parthenogenesis
     noun
: asexual reproduction in which a female can produce an embryo without fertilizing an egg with sperm. In Greek, it means the virgin creation.

What’s with the virgin birth mania in so many religions? Humans, unlike Komodo dragons and California condors don’t have a talent for virginal reproduction. 

Romulus and Remus, the founders of Rome, were born of the Vestal Virgin, Rhea Silvia. Supposedly, the sperm donor was the god Mars. (not to be confused with the candy bar) This was in the 4th century BCE.

Attis, the Phrygian vegetation and fertility deity was conceived by the Great Goddess (in the form of the virgin, Nana) and a pomegranate seed of all things. This also dates from the 4th century BCE.

Dionysus, god of nature, vino, and good times was born of Semele, virgin and princess of Thebes. Zeus was the father. As with Romulus and Remus’s mum, she was still technically a virgin after doing the horizontal tango with a god. It’s also written that Persephone was Dionysus's mother and had been a virgin when Zeus knocked her up.

Zarathushtra was an Iranian religious reformer and prophet, traditionally considered as the founder of Zoroastrianism. His mum, Dughdova, was a virgin when she conceived him via a shaft of light. At least that’s what she told her parents when they yelled at her for fucking around without having a ring on her finger.

The Hindu god Krishna is said to have been conceived when Vishnu dropped his wee swimmers in the womb of Devaki. She was married BUT seen as a "virgin mother" due to getting up the spout by a god.

Perseus, a Greek demi-god was born to the virginal Danae after the god Jupiter visited her as a shower of gold. Who knew, Jupiter was into golden showers but not condoms.

Mercury was born to the virgin Maia and Zeus. I only mention it BUT Zeus really got around.
The Egyptian god Horus may or may NOT have had a virgin mother. It kinda depends on how you look at it. Horus’s daddy, Osiris, was murdered and disassembled with his bits scattered far and wide. His wife, Isis, was magic. She reassembled him but couldn’t find his willy. Isis entered the body of a bird of prey (NO, not a Klingon ship!), flew around Osiris’s dickless body and ended up preggers.

Moral of the story? In order to avoid the wrath, disdain, and douchebaggery of parental units, bumptious co-workers, judgey neighbors, and pompous pricks everywhere, if you discover that you’ve a bun in the oven but aren’t sure of the sperm donor, tell ‘em all that you have a friends-with-benefits arrangement with Zeus, Osiris, a pomegranate seed, Jupiter or whoever the god du jour might be.

Did you ever notice that everyone in favour of birth control has already been born?
~ Benny Hill

Virginity is now a mere preamble or waiting room to be got out of as soon as possible; it is without significance.
~ Ursula K. Le Guin