Babel

Tower of Babel — Pieter Bruegel The Elder

“We live in America,' he said. 'Everyone who speaks English understands you. How they interpret you is something else.”
~ Carrie Fisher, Postcards from the Edge

Communication is the exchange and flow of information and ideas from one person to another; it involves a sender transmitting an idea, information, or feeling to a receiver. ~ U.S. Army, 1983

Effective communication occurs only if the receiver understands the exact information or idea that the sender intended to transmit. ~ Mistry, Jaggers, Lodge, Alton, Mericle, Frush, Meliones, 2008

Conversation, discussion can easily be a tremendously convoluted, 12 level Samba even when everyone speaks (or hears) the same language.

Think about it.  We’ve all got our own very unique internal wiring. We were raised in different families and environments, had dissimilar schooling and social experiences. Our very specific personal histories serve to, amongst other things, create filters or lenses through which we interpret everything around us.

You know the cliche he/she sees the world through rose colored glasses? Same idea. We all receive information funneled through the firmly entrenched filters of our life experiences.

It doesn’t pay to assume that a concept or set of directions that is utterly clear in our own minds, will be crystalline to anyone else. More often than not, it won’t be unless we map it out.

Consider basic exchanges of info/concepts at work. When you need a worker bee, a co-worker or your manager to do something for you, do you organize your thoughts and requests first? Do you start at point A, follow with points B and C in line and then get to the goal, D? Do you bundle your message/request in a succinct package of sentences?

If not, why not? You want a smooth successful exchange of info, you want your co-worker to fully grok what you need them to do for you—right? Before you speak, outline your thoughts.

No really. Your husband/wife/sister/BFF/therapist/bartender/shoe sales dude may be able to read your mind, knows exactly what you want or need with the exchange of just a phrase or a series of grunts but the vast majority of folk are just gonna be all ‘huh?’

And that’s WITH y’all speaking the very same language.

What’s involved with trying to communicate with a deafie -- me, for example? SLOW down! I’m trying to read your lips -- not an easy thing. On top of putting your rate of speech into a slower gear, I need context. If you’re attempting to tell me about a new procedure or plan, start with a short introductory sentence. ‘Hi Donna, let’s talk about the new design for Roger Ramjet business cards.’ See, that clues me in so that I can have a leg up (an ear up?) on interpreting/translating the movement of your lips, your body language into an understandable message.

If I just can’t catch a word, use a different one. The thesaurus is our friend. If that doesn’t work, write the word down or, if we’re by a computer, open a text doc and keyboard it in. Hey, better still -- show me what you’re talking about!

Here’s a useful bit, whether you’re chatting with a native speaker/hearer of your language or not, check your understanding. I do this all the time. E.g., conversationalist A says ‘if you stick a Babel fish in your ear you can instantly understand anything’ (from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy). Conversationalist B says ‘let me see if I’ve understood you correctly...’ and paraphrases what he/she has heard and understood. ‘Did you say if I put a stable dish in my ear, I’ll understand everything?’

You get the picture. There's back and forth until comprehension's achieved.

A conversation with me won’t necessarily be all whiz bang, swift city, caffeinated Gilbert and Sullivan-esque but, I’ll tell you right now, we’ll understand each other.