Flight

Here’s what I love about flight:

the view.

I feel as though I’m in a wholly different world when I look out the window.

It's bird envy -- I’m monster envious of bar-headed geese . Yes, Jonathan Livingston Seagull was a fav book when I was young too.  In my imagination I’m Maximum Ride but only in the soaring, gravity-emancipated, limitless sections not the malicious mutant evading ones.

Six kids who are pretty normal in most ways—except that they're 98 percent human, 2 percent bird. They grew up in a lab, living like rats in cages, but now they're free.

That’s about it for flight likes. It does feel far less annoying lately though. This is probably mostly due to not making long trips in the last couple of years. Good news/bad news.

In a perfect world I'd be in Vienna right now, eating Dobostorte while I wait for Kunsthistorisches Museum, Kunst Haus, The Belvedere and The Klimt Museum to open. BUT this just isn’t the year for a long vacas -- just weekend getaways.

Here’s another thing -- there seems to be more leg room now plus, either the seats don’t recline anymore or I’ve been lucky and no clueless 'let's recline ALL THE WAY' types have been in front of me. I’m far from tall and not otherwise big but it’s never taken much to squish me into a royally uncomfortable, claustrophobic stress ball. This is all of why I quit flying British and Icelandic Airs. Somewhere along the line they added 100 more seats per row (more or less). The only way to have gotten comfortable would have involved detaching my legs, reducing my bust size and smoking a big fatty before boarding (that last is never a bad idea, come to think of it).

Possibly the leg room increase thing is just jetBlue, the carrier I most often take when I visit Daddy.

One complaint and this isn’t just a jetBlue issue -- the televisions. Having them in the seat backs is just lovely but how about adding a closed caption option? I’d pay a buck (same as the rental fee for the headphones) so that I could understand what, in Kali’s name, Sponge Bob is saying.

I just found this handy dandy chart, Most Comfy Seats By Region, compiled by George Hobica. Looks like I’ll be checking out AirFrance next time I go to Europe. My pals in Tuscana despised AirFrance after having series of nasty ass experiences though.

Sigh, there's no way to make this painless is there?

Travel would be MUCH less frustrating and uncomfortable, far less crankifying if only those Star Trekian transporter beams would get invented. Now please.