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Friday, April 3, 2015


“O sleep, O gentle sleep, Nature's soft nurse, how have I frightened thee, that thou no more will weigh my eyelids down, and steep my senses in forgetfulness?”

Sleep, that most illusive thing—this past night anyway.

I believe the internet was created for those of us plagued with insomnia.

Did ya know? There’s a hotel in Wales where you can pay £500 (~$741) to sleep suspended from a cliff. No really!

At night, you rappel down to a canvas platform and, yes, you’re harnessed in. Dinner and a full Welsh breakfast are included—they’re lowered down from the cliff top by the staff who MUST be snickering the whole time. Honestly.

OK, I’m actually, curiously interested now.
There are a number of positives, aside from being able to boast to friends of your derring-do. There are no neighbours or next-door guests to disturb you with raucous partying.
Even if there were, you wouldn’t hear them thanks to the pounding proximity of the Irish Sea.
There is also a constant supply of fresh air.
That sounds pretty cool BUT I really can’t see myself shelling out the big bucks to camp. Hells, I wouldn’t spend a dime to camp. I’m quite keen on indoor plumbing and luxe mattresses, thank you.

If the idea of sleeping on a vertical rock face with only a sliver of canvas between you and the waves crashing 200ft below keeps you awake at night, then ‘cliff camping’ is probably not for you.
Perhaps I need to work my way up to cliff camping by staying at the Faralda Crane Hotel in Amsterdam.
Previously an industrial crane, the Faralda Crane Hotel is located in the former FDSM shipyard, at the edge of the river and the Amsterdam city center. Guests can stay in one of the three luxury hotel suites located in the crane’s old machine room. According to the hotel’s website, the suites are located about 50 meters (164 feet) in the air, accessible by elevator, and they offer views overlooking the Amsterdam waterfront.  Daredevil visitors can also bungee jump from the top of the crane, while others can simply unwind in the outdoor Jacuzzi and take in the panorama.
 Eh, no thanks on the bungee jumping but the Jacuzzi plus view sounds cool.

If I ever find myself longing for Jabba the Hutt’s desert digs I can stay in the Desert Lotus Hotel in Mongolia. I wonder if the management provides SPF 5,000 sunscreen and a 50 gallon drum of industrial strength moisturizer in each boudoir.

One more interesting hotel—The V8 in Stuttgart.
Each suite features beds designed to look like classic, vintage, sporty or modern motorcars. Some of the rooms are even themed to resemble a drive-in, auto workshop and car wash, reports The Daily Mail.
Def appeals to the vintage car lover in me.

HuffPo has 37 Science-Backed Tips For Better Sleep, most of which I already do though not persistently. The consistency gap is undoubtedly what inspired my state of intense wakefulness at 1AM.

Tip number 16 though, ban furry friends from bed, ain’t gonna happen. Rocco sleeps at my side and his presence is a real comfort. He’s tremendously considerate too. Our former feral warrior king doesn’t even wake me in the morning when he’s hungry. Rocco either gets up and sits by his bowl patiently until I rise or he stands next to my head, giving me his ultra concentrated WAKE UP NOW stare. It works too. I always wake up...eventually.

“I've always envied people who sleep easily. Their brains must be cleaner, the floorboards of the skull well swept, all the little monsters closed up in a steamer trunk at the foot of the bed.”
David Benioff, City of Thieves

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