All Things Must Pass

There are days where I feel as though I’m just not gonna make it. What does that even mean though? I'm def not the seppuku type. I’m not at death’s door. I’m not in spectacularly dire emotional or financial straits. I have brill, supportive friends and famiglia. Yeah, there were a few real fuckers in the bunch but I’ve...emmm...culled the herd.

So, wut up? Why, as I sat at a stoplight during yesterday's epic errandizing, did this blood and thunder declaration spring to mind?

Eh:

•  I’m phenomenally tired and, on top of that, have a few new aches and pains that are, temporarily, keeping me from hitting the gym (exercise – it’s my anti-depressant).
• The daily horror show of Republican rule leaves me afraid and overwhelmed. Will it ever end?
• I’m anxious and fearful about my upcoming eyeball surgery, even though it’s, honestly, no big.
• And, I feel like I’m constantly disappointing the people I care about – not doing or being enough.

Plus, of course, I feel that everything would be easier, less scary, if The Amazing Bob was here. It would too!

Where do I go from here?

I’ll do loads of gentle yoga-ish exercising in an attempt to lift this fog. I’ll talk things over with Janice later today. Mebbe it’s time to start a new painting or, at least, go doodle wild. Also too, though I’m back on the Diet Train, a wee square of dark chocolate won’t hurt and it's decidely in order.

All things must pass, no?

Unexpressed emotions will never die. They are buried alive and will come forth later in uglier ways.
~ Sigmund Freud

We were not a hugging people. In terms of emotional comfort it was our belief that no amount of physical contact could match the healing powers of a well made cocktail.
~ David Sedaris, Naked

I can only note that the past is beautiful because one never realises an emotion at the time. It expands later, and thus we don't have complete emotions about the present, only about the past.
~ Virginia Woolf

Dream delivers us to dream, and there is no end to illusion. Life is like a train of moods like a string of beads, and, as we pass through them, they prove to be many-colored lenses which paint the world their own hue. . . .
~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

The oldest and strongest emotion of mankind is fear.
~ H.P. Lovecraft