July Words—get 'em while they're hot!

Hurkle-Durkle
     verb (Scots)
To hurkle-durkle is to lie in bed or lounge about when. one should be up and about.

Let it be known throughout the land that I am the reigning champ of hurkle-durkling.

I had my first workout—not just a ‘hi, how ya doing and where are you at in your rehabbing’ but an exclusively balance oriented physical therapy appointment. Lemme tell you, this is some world class exhausting shit. The exercises all seem to be simple, slow and easy but then, on the 7th rep, the pain and sapping muscle fatigue comes calling.

Muscles: Hi, you haven’t used us much in the past three or four years. That, pretty much, pisses us clean off and we’re here to show you just how much.
Me: Oh c’mon—can’t you cut me some slack?
Muscles: Fuck no!

So, no more hurkle-durkling for yurs devitalized truly. Today will be too hot to walk (90º!) so I’ll be here in the AC ellipticalling and doing balance drills which, on first glance, LOOK deceptively easy-peasy.

Enisle
     verb
to make an island of.

I’ve got an early Paul Simon tune in my head now—I am a rock I am enisle. What? That’s not how it goes?

Esperance
     noun
the feeling that what is wanted can be had or that events will turn out for the best.

Synonyms for esperance include delusional, unrealistic and you’re-fucking-dreaming.

Debouch [ dih-boosh ]
     verb
to come forth; emerge.

Nope. Debouch is the act of self-immolation. Think of the former Obama supporting, drag queen loving, local teevee talking head, KKKari Lake. She’s now even more Trump-drunk and Qanon crazy than her reality eschewing, whack job buddy Madge.

Kari Lake really debouched when she shamelessly dove into Trump’s fetid universe.

Olykoek [ ol-i-kook ]
     noun
doughnut.
Olykoek has its origins in the now-extinct New York dialect of Dutch

I could really go for a glazed old-fashioned olykoek right about now.

Casefy
     verb
to make or become like cheese.
Casefy comes from Latin cāseus, “cheese”

NOT to be confused with cacasfy (also from Latin)—to make or become like shit. I’d rather be casefied than cacasfied but, ya know, that may just be me.

Yestreen
     adverb
during yesterday evening.
The yestr- part of yestreen is a shortened form of yesterday, which comes from Old English. The -een element is the same as that in Halloween; it’s short for even, an archaic word for “evening.” Yestreen was first recorded in English in the mid-14th century.

Sure, this all sounds good and intellectual and shit BUT, the word means something entirely different. Yestreen describes anything, any action reminiscent of the utterly insane rich dude, Kanye West  (AKA Ye).

Iowa’s Republican Party has taken a predictable, despicable and yestreen path in their six week abortion ban.

Pasteurize
     verb
to expose to an elevated temperature for a period sufficient to destroy certain microorganisms, without radically altering taste or quality.

Nope. While still a verb, what this means is to create, in your mind, a past where everyone had the same rights and access to things like good schools, water fountains, healthcare, lunch counters, safety and to live where you wished. It’s nostalgia for a past that never was.

Artiodactyl
     adjective
having an even number of toes or digits on each foot.

No, this is the condition where you’re no longer able to paint (with fingers or toes) due to some medical bullshit or other.

Donna’s essential tremors have caused her to become nearly artiodactyl.