Born to Fail

When I’m feeling down, like I’m just not accomplishing my goals or living up to my potential, I can think of the serial fuck ups who were born with platinum spoons in their gaping, grasping maws. One in particular.

This, from a seven year old, Labor 411 post (before he destroyed the U.S.A.).

Here are Trump’s failed businesses:

1. Trump Steaks (meat for people who hate animals and have no taste)
2. GoTrump (a travel website for assholic ugly Americans)
3. Trump Airlines (each seat comes with its own parachute—kidding. If the plane dives you're on your own. Not unlike Space Karen's cars)
4. Trump Vodka (made in the Netherlands and, later, Germany. HOW can you bomb with booze? By putting a toxic waste product’s name on the label, that's how)
5. Trump Mortgage (for idiots who want to lose their homes)
6. Trump: The Game (a Monopoly rip-off that, unsurprisingly, no one wanted)
7. Trump Magazine (Luxury Lifestyle Magazine Can’t Pay Its Own Employees)
8. Trump University (the school to attend if your goal is failure)
9. Trump Ice (bottled water for people who like to drink out of full toilet bowls)
10. The New Jersey Generals (I have NO idea what this is {apart from a sportsball thingie} and I’ll bet Cheeto didn’t either)
11. Tour de Trump (the obese fucker’s attempt at co-opting the Tour de France. MIGHT’ve succeeded if he got on a damn bike himself {which will happen right after octopi fly and I get my hearing back})
12. Trump Network (a vitamins and health products scam. I mean, honestly now, Idiot Boy and health supplements? The dipshit narcissist considers cheeseburgers healthy and ketchup as a vegetable and wall decoration)
13. Trumped! (a talk radio program hosted by Cheeto the Loser Boy. Who the fuck would voluntarily listen to this rat fucker’s voice?)

And here are the Tangerine Twat’s many bankrupt hotels and casinos:

1. Trump Taj Mahal
2. Trump’s Castle
3. Trump Plaza Casinos
4. Trump Plaza Hotel
5. Trump Hotels and Casinos Resorts
6. Trump Entertainment Resorts

Yes, those of us NOT in his cult knew he was and continues to be a biz failure. We knew long before he bought, conned and Russia-ed his way into the White House.

We can add Truth Social to this long list of fuckup failures by the hamster-headed, rotted-brain, tangerine thundercunt formerly known as 45 and the former guy.

While Trump Media projected Goof (“Truth”) Social would have 41 million users by the end of 2023, The Post notes that it currently has about 500,000 monthly active users. Which, according to my back-of-the-envelope calculations is … less. Less than 41 million. (source)

Everything he touches turns to weasel snot soaked porcupine shit.