Weasel Sh*t Theater

Welcome to Stinky’s Weasel Shit Theater where absolutely nothing the fifth rate, flea bag, stoinking-mad carnival barker spews has anything in common with reality.

Those nuclear joints we supposedly “obliterated?” Yeah, not so much. Putin’s missle and drone suppliers got the word to move Stinky’s boss’s goods BEFORE the too-melodramatic-to-be-a-decent-drag queen and his renfields gave the Action! cue.

But as evidence that the strikes may have missed the uranium stocks, both Albright and Lewis point to commercial satellite imagery from the days before the strike. The images show trucks at two key sites — Isfahan and Fordo. The trucks appear to be sealing tunnels that serve as entrances to underground facilities used to store uranium, possibly in anticipation of an American attack. 

Both experts believe Iranians could have also moved their enriched uranium out of the sites in the run-up to the U.S. strikes.
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Albright says Iran may also have thousands of uranium-enriching centrifuges that were never installed in Natanz and Fordo. (source)  

How did Iran know to move the uranium stocks before the strike? Did Petey Kegstand include them on the Signal Chat planning session? I mean, that is his proven style. We should maybe ring up his wife, brother, and personal shyster. Maybe they can enlighten us all?

So, now old Anus Face is talking about instituting regime change in Iran. HAH! I believe the world would be far better served by having the US regime changed.

I’m now ignoring the news for at least the next few days. 

In other exciting Valhalla news, we’re in the midst of a big-ass heat wave. It’s gonna be in the 90s! This is fucking New England not Texas or Arizona! NOT FAIR!!! I want to speak to the manager.

Also, another of our big trees crashed down during a sudden, wild wind storm on Friday. Luckily, this time, it didn’t take out any of our vehicles or damage our houses. Still, I’m in mourning over the loss of yet another old soul. It’s only been a few months since we lost the last one.

 Re: the last dearly-departed-timber-toppling, we finally got Godzilla, our electric MINI back from the repair shop. If you recall, in its death throes, the tree struck a strong but nonlethal blow to our wee monster car. It was in the auto hospital for nearly three months. Why so long? Parts had to come from Germany. These were hung up due to Stinky’s stupid tariff trade games. Conveniently our all electric ‘zilla’s back in time for the upcoming soaring of gas prices. 

The fuck’s that about? Welp, because the tantrum toddler didn’t have big, beautiful crowds at his Soviet-style birthday parade, because his popularity numbers are in the toilet, he’s about as popular as Saint Bernard vomit on your quit at bedtime, and everyone at G7 was laughing at him, he bombed Iran. In return, it looks like Iran will be closing the Strait of Hormuz.

About 20% of global oil and gas flows through this narrow shipping lane in the Gulf. Blocking it would have profound consequences for the global economy, disrupting international trade and ratcheting up oil prices. (source) 

OUCH! If that clown faced pile of fresh rhino feces thought maybe he’d become a tad unpopular before, he’s in for an uncomfortable education.

This amateur hour administration is SO not up to the Sisyphian chore of cleaning up after Trump’s dumps. Mister intelligence is irrelevant, the Secretary of Dipshittery, Marco Rubio, has been begging China to intervene – to save us all and get Iran to just lay down and docilely take its bombing.

Yeah dude. In the real world, outside of Republican playacting, reality show teevee time, tough guy bullshit theater, that’s not how life works. Also, it might’ve smoothed the diplomacy path if Clownshoes hadn’t slapped China with a zillion byzantine steep-ass tariffs beforehand, eh? 

Okay...I'm getting totally offline NOW. No, no, fer reals this time. Gonna do my exercises, read, and get on the damn elliptical. Honest!