More Talk About Buildings and Food

Okay, no talk about buildings, just food. You’ll never guess who’s putting the kibosh on any investigation of the whole poop geyser phenom. Oh, who am I kidding? Of course you already know!

The Trump administration is shuttering two of the three US Department of Agriculture research projects studying cyclospora after the foodborne parasite has sickened tens of thousands of Americans during the summer, Politico reported on Sunday. 
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Scientists researching foodborne parasites, including cyclospora, are retiring or leaving the USDA’s ARS rather than relocating (from Maryland to Iow) or being reassigned to other projects, the report said.

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention has  recorded more than 17,000 confirmed cyclosporiasis cases across 48 states plus Washington DC, from 1 May to 24 August, making it one of the largest foodborne illness outbreaks in recent US history.

At least 11,844 additional cases may require further investigation and analysis, the CDC said. (source) 

Naturally, the thin-skinned, odoriferous, dimbulbed, clownfuck pedophile prez is shutting down important research that could keep U.S. citizens healthy and alive! They'd make him look bad by pointing to his and his wholly incompetent, rapacious, band of billionaire bandit pals who are robbing us all into our graves. Can't have the 80-year-old heavily made-up, bewigged, begirdled, shoe lift wearing malignant narcissist looking bad now, can we? What's that you say? We're about 79 years, 11 months and 30 days too late? Eh, fair point.

Anyway. here’s a partial list of what’s NOT safe to eat right now:

Salmonella
• Fresh jalapeño
• White and brown shells eggs from Country Morning, Cal-Maine Sunups, Brookshire’s, Simple Truth, and Kroger
• Guacamole sold at Whole Foods 
• Lidl Spice Mix
• Walmart Pistachio Nut Butter 
• Lacnola Lactation Granola
• Food to Live Greens Powder
• MOGO-brand Pure Moringa Oleifera capsules
 •Rosabella-brand moringa powder capsules

E. coli
• GreenWise Organic Whole Frozen Blueberries and GreenWise Organic Frozen Mixed Berries 
• Raw Farm: Raw Cheddar Cheese

Both Salmonella and e. coli
• Everything Sprouts, sold under the Calco and Everything Sprouts brands 

Listeria
• Walmart Tomato Bisque
The following soft cheeses:
• Requeson Salvadoreño (Ricotta Style Salvadorean Cheese), Requeson Mexicano (Mexican Cottage Cheese), all Clover Hill Dairy, LLC products

Cyclospora AKA Poop geysering
• Taylor Farms Iceberg lettuce 

Infant botulism
• Nara Organics Whole Milk Organic Powdered Infant Formula

Other Issues:
• Amy's Lentil Soup
     Defective pull tab on the can puts the soup at risk of spoiling earlier than listed.  
• Peter Rabbit Organics Fruit Pouches
     Banana & Strawberry fruit puree pouches recalled for a were recalled for a packaging defect that could leave a strand of plastic inside the product.
• Outshine Fruit Bars 
     Found to contain glass.
• Lundberg Family Farms Jasmine White Rice, 2 lb bags. 
     Recalled due to “possible contamination with foreign material.” Sold at Wegmans, Walmart, Target, and Whole Foods.

And, of course, if you’re a meat eater, it’s probably best to avoid burgers for the time being. What’s being sold to you as cow meat is, perhaps, NOT. We don’t know where all those slaughtered wild horses actually went to AND the Argentinian beef buy is pretty damn hinky.

China's customs agency did stop a 22-ton shipment in March after detecting chloramphenicol, an antibiotic banned in food animals for its link to a rare blood disorder. (source) 

At this point the only thing safe is water out of your tap. Oh wait, maybe not.

Every year, tens of millions of Americans get their water from public systems that violate federal safety standards, and most never find out. The federal government tracks these violations through the EPA's Safe Drinking Water Information System, which logs every time a utility breaks a rule for contaminant limits, treatment, or monitoring.

If you live in one of the states with the worst tap water, what comes out of your faucet may carry lead, PFAS, or other contaminants at levels the EPA considers unsafe. (source) 

These 10 states are the top offenders.

• Texas
• Pennsylvania
• Florida
• California
• Ohio
• New Jersey
• Illinois
• Arizona
• Georgia
• North Carolina

Well, there’s always air, right? We can still breathe, can’t we? Sure, as long as you’re in one of the safe states like Vermont or New Hampshire but Pennsylvania and California might be problematic.

//sigh// I think I’m going back to bed soon with a good book, some snacks and Cake.

Make Food Edible Again!

This whole ripping apart of society, treating the working class as if we’re lazy-ass, worthless, perverted beggars who should be thankful to be spit on by fat-arsed, botoxed, planet defiling pedophiles, is kind of counterintuitive. Don’cha think? I mean, being stepped on, being bullied isn’t exactly a big motivator. I don’t think that’s just me.

Also, who's gonna bag their groceries, mix their mojitos, whip up an Iced Coconut Mocha, give them a mani/pedi, clean their homes, fix their cars, plumbing, teach their rugrats, if we're all sick, homeless (so can't score employment), too disabled (from lack of proper, affordable healthcare) or dead?

Project 2025, as planned, promised, and publicly stated, is destabilizing our most basic needs – water, food safety, food, assistance, sleep, clothing, safety, shelter, healthcare, including the meds we need to live, bodily security and there's more to come. They're surgically taking apart society piece by piece.

When we’re hungry and sick, we’re easier to control. If the proletariat are fighting each other for scarce resources, we’ll be too distracted or weakened to go up against them, the real villains who continue to rob us into early graves.  

Desperate people will turn to theft and crime. Where will they be sent? Why, they'll be sent to Trump's for-profit prison pals, GEO Group and CoreCivic. They're currently doing boffo business housing innocent immigrants who've been beaten, terrorized, and kidnapped by Trump's criminally banjaxed ICEholes.

Private for-profit prisons incarcerated 90,873 American residents in 2022, representing 8% of the total state and federal prison population. Since 2000, the number of people housed in private prisons has increased 5%. (source) 

The 13th Amendment bans slavery and involuntary servitude BUT that doesn’t count if you’re in the joint. IF you get paid, you’ll be lucky to make 12 to 40 cents per hour.

No need to pay Americans a fair, living wage OR export your work needs to China for cheap menial labor! Now, with Prez Pedo and Project 2025, you can have everything done at the local for-profit prison by Sally, Maria, and Gina. They were imprisoned for stealing Pampers and Cheerios for their kids after SNAP benefits were slashed.

The entire country is going to become, essentially, an open air forced labor camp.

…while commentators agree that about half of Project 2025's proposals have been implemented, that means over half have not, including:

• Rescinding approval of abortion pills and a ban on sending them through the post

• The classification of teachers and librarians who discuss "transgender ideology" with children as sex offenders

• A reduction in US forces in Europe and a shift in the US military's focus towards China

• The addition of a citizenship question to the US Census (source) 

Did you know that frozen blueberries and mixed berries from GreenWise Organic are now on the DO NOT INGEST list? They were subject to a Class I recall at Publix. This means use or exposure could cause serious health problems or death.

Also alfalfa sprouts from Calco and Everything Sprouts brands. These have made more than 65 people across roughly 20 states sick. Thrilling, eh?

One last thing – the collapse of the US farming industry is intentional. It's engineered so the land can be snapped up cheap. The farmers can be kept on as tenant farmers or vasals. They'll run it for the oligarchs. Of course.

Before you take a bite ...

The Tower of Blue Horses, Franz Marc

... understand that it may not be what you think it is.  

Yesterday Pedo announced that he scored 300,000 metric tons of foreign ground beef that he’s going to have imported from unnamed sources (fell of the back of a truck?) without the “out of quota” tariff. I’m figuring that last bit refers to the tax levied on us, the consumers, which is what Trump’s tariffs are. He says he’s committed to ensuring the imported beef would be sold at 25% below current market rates. This ought to make U.S. cattle ranchers real happy!

This beef buy is to make up for our current cow meat shortage. WHY are there fewer edible cows in America right now? WHY is the Prez panicking?

Did all the coos emigrate to Canada and Mexico because, like other sane Americans, they despise Pedo and could see that, without voting rights or opposable thumbs, they were, pretty much, fucked? Nope. Banjaxed Brained MusKKK’s teenaged dimwit DOGE squad chainsawed the programs that watched out for and controlled little devastating things like screwworm infestations. Those boys, whose balls undoubtedly haven’t dropped yet, decided those programs were fraud and unnecessary.

Beef prices have risen in recent months due in large part to a severe cattle shortage, one exacerbated by the recent screwworm infestation that has threatened Texas ranchers – and, by some critics, blamed on the Trump administration for having terminated USAID-funded screwworm monitoring programs operated by the UN Food and Agriculture Organization. (source) 

The Yellow Cow, Franz Marc

By the by, this magical meat purchase coincidentally comes on the heels (hooves) of the reports that herds of wild horses are being rounded up by helicopters and slaughtered.

Mustang advocates say a New York Times report proves horses rounded up from the range in Wyoming and other states have been sent to slaughter. An advocacy group is now asking Interior Secretary Doug Burgum to shut down all sales of wild horses. (source) 

(I’d link to the NYTimes article but it’s paywalled. I don’t have subscription from which to link a gift article. While the Times does have good reporting … there’s enough capitulation to the regime that I don’t want to give them my dough.)

All this is to say that unless you’re RFK jr. or share his gastronomic tendencies, I’d stay away from what’s labeled as “beef” until maybe the next president is in office.

Now might be a great time to become a vegetarian … unless you live in the U.S. where there’s a massive, multi-state shit geyser outbreak still going on. This has been brought to us by Trump mega donors, Taylor Farms.

More than 9,400 cases associated with this outbreak have been reported in 17 states, per the FDA: Arkansas, Illinois, Indiana, Iowa, Kansas, Kentucky, Maine, Massachusetts, Michigan, Missouri, Nebraska, New Hampshire, North Carolina, Ohio, Oklahoma, Pennsylvania, and West Virginia. 
~~~
Only three states have reported zero cases since May 1: New Mexico, Montana and Hawaii.

The true number of cyclospora infections in the U.S. is likely higher than the numbers currently being reported — that’s because many people recover on their own and never get tested for cyclospora, per the CDC. (source) 

Oh but wait, now there’s not one but TWO salmonella outbreaks! One is from, again, Trump’s pals Taylor Farms. This time it’s jalapeños. 

As of Monday, 15,716 cases of the stomach bug had been confirmed in 47 states and Washington, D.C., the CDC reported. That’s up by 1,821 from its last update a week ago. (source)

The other salmonella case is courtesy of Indiana based Midwest Poultry Service. The states where the bad eggs were shipped to were Louisiana, Texas, Oklahoma, Arkansas, New Mexico and Mississippi but …

At least 98 people in 17 states have been sickened, with 26 people hospitalized. (source) 

Since Brainworm Bobby gutted the Food and Drug Administration, his idiotic, uneducated, control freaking, fever dream fantasies of how he thinks ALL Americans should eat and live is playing out real, gosh darn swell, ain’t it? 

Top to bottom, this is THE Dunning-Kruger presidency.

🚨  Just in! 🚨

RFK jr. suggests we all eat roadkill (as he does) until all this salmonella and shit geysering passes. That ought to be … what? 2030 or so? After the next administration is in and has had half a chance to rebuild some of the country?

Just kidding. Brainworm Bob’s more apt to recommend we all go on a 60 day fast and swim in the sewers. 

Distraction Theater

Christopher Weyant

Who needs who more?

Trump wanted to play big dictator tough guy with Iran — outdo Obama’s deal in a big, thunder and brimstone show of he-man bombing. He's bombing alright.

It’s testosterone theater – overcompensation for his obvious, massive insecurities. Also a distraction from all things Epstein, those pesky ICE murderers, bombing Venezuelan fishermen, financial crimes, and other assorted failures, felonies, and idiocies.

Bibi needed U.S. money, bombs, and rep in order to go after the folks he wanted to attack anyway. Why hit Iran (besides the fact that he’s never met a mass murder he didn’t fall in love with immediately)? Maybe to distract from his ongoing corruption trials and the ICC's arrest warrant for war crimes and crimes against humanity. Plus there’s an election coming in October. Old Beeb’s popularity, like Prez Pedo’s, is on the wane. Netanyahu is still a hit with Israel’s version of MAGA, nationalist religious factions, and general right-wingers though.

Brandan Reynolds

Like Prez Fuckface, Beebs needs a boost. Pathetically (hilariously?), he thinks visiting the U.S., being seen with the world’s biggest no-talent chiseling fuck-up is gonna give him some shine. WOW! That’s some serious clue-free delusion, mes amis.

On top of that:

“Netanyahu arrives in Washington at a time when even many around [Trump] are suspicious of him. He has become toxic in the US,” Ahron Bregman, an Israeli security analyst and senior teaching fellow in the Department for War Studies at King’s College London. “He is regarded in the US – rightly or wrongly – as the one who dragged Trump into a war of choice that has turned into a strategic catastrophe. Nobody, not even Trump, will let him pretend to be the cleverest guy in the room. Those days are gone.” (source) 

Bibi’s not popular in the U.S. and Trump’s not popular in the world at large. These two are grade A toxic twins.

Did you read that Trump and his greasy, deeply twisted War Crimes Secretary dropped more bombs on Iran last night? They killed six people including three civilians – a couple and their two-year-old kid. Still proud to be an American? Rah, rah, rah?

Bill Bramhall

Meanwhile, here in the Disunited Kakistocratic Plutocracy of America, Republican’s war on Black voters in the south doesn’t appear to be going quite as smoothly as they’d expected. Perhaps, when Trump’s pet Supreme Court torpedoed the Voting Rights Act, they actually shot him and his party of shortsighted, bigoted imbeciles in the foot?

A new analysis of Black voters in the south indicates that Republican attempts to dilute their political power is driving them to the polls in larger numbers and shifting their counties further left.
~~~
The analysis by VoteHub, a data-focused election organization, indicates that the efforts have only motivated Black voters in the 78 Black belt counties it tracked. All but one shifted left in partisan turnout compared with 2024. Further, majority-Black counties that voted after Louisiana v Callais, the landmark supreme court decision that triggered the Republican-led redistricting efforts, had a surge in voter participation. 
~~~
In nearby Louisiana, Black voters made up 35.7% of the primary electorate, despite making up only 32.1% of the population. The state experienced increased voter turnout across partisan groups and race, but 30.9% of Black voters cast ballots in the primary election – 3.2 points more than white voters. (source) 

A return to Jim Crow is NOT a lock!

Here’s something really great though – I had THE most amazing sandwich last night. It was a Tomato Caprese – fresh mozzarella, vine ripe tomato, pesto, roasted peppers, basil and olive oil on marble rye. OH MY FUCKING GOD! 

Astoundingly I was able to control myself and only ate half. I’ll have the other half for breakfast this morning.

Some days all it takes is the small things – like a brilliant sandwich –  to get me charged up and ready to face the day’s battles. 

Gingerbread and Sh*t

 As you may (or mayn’t) know, I don’t get outta the neighborhood much. When I do, it’s to go to the Y, rehab or Mass General for one of my never-ending series of appointments. On the way, we pass this bakery and its attached shop. All they make is gingerbread – cookies, houses, and, I assume, loaves. That’s pretty niche and, biz-wise, bold, eh? I mean, gingerbread is all fine and dandy but is there really enough gingerbread love out there to support a dedicated bakery AND a retail outlet?  My town’s not a big tourist stop so the owners have to be relying on locals to snarf up all those goodies.

I stop in there a couple times a year – usually only in December. There’s a variety of ginger cookies and they do make for lovely little gifts. I seem to recall they sell a few types of loose candies too.

Here’s the thing – last time we drove by there, all the windows were plastered with Turning Point USA signs. Weird. Very.

The name of the bakery is still over the front door and the awnings are still up but the windows, from the inside, are covered. Has the bakery closed and been replaced by a Saint Chiclets’ hard-right, extremist, hate emporium? TPUSA is a hate group that grooms children to become imbecilic spooge-bags. They actually pay teens to spread lies and propaganda on social media.  

Maybe the bakery is still there but has covered all their windows with pro-idiot, pro-racist, pro-bullshit posters in support of their "martyred" hero? If so – not a smart biz move. I mean, my town may not be quite as blue as Cambridge but this is still Massachusetts and it is pretty damn blue here. Announcing your bigotry, your hate, and utter, stone boneheadedness is a great way to lose customers. There ARE at least two other very good, small bakeries in town and I’m sure they sell gingerbread in November and December as well.

I read that Saint Chiclets’ hate org is thinking about cancelling their planned Super Bowl halftime show due to lack of interest. Seems they can’t find a right wing star who will draw a crowd. 

Let’s see now….who are the big right-wing musical acts?

There’s 54 year old Robert Ritchie, AKA Kid Rock, who hasn’t had a hit song since 2015. I bet they could get 76 year old Ted Nugent whose last hit was in 1975 — 50 years ago. 48 year old country music singer Jason Aldean might be available. Act fast and 84 year old Beach Boy Mike Love would probably turn up. Hey, give Johnny Ramone, Elvis Presley or Meat Loaf a call! Oh wait, they’re all dead. Nevermind. So much for appealing to the young'uns.

Why is dead Chuckie’s White is Right group trying to put on a different show? They don’t like Bad Bunny’s politics, his color, the language he speaks, the territory he hails from. Basically, they hate that he’s not a zombie white fascist. Sucks to be them, huh?

Hey, did you see this headline? It’s from 2021 but seems appropriate today.

Man Arrested After Allegedly Swinging Full Colostomy Bag at Kid Rock’s Bar 

Twitter account @ScanNashville, which regularly reports on Tennessee police activity, received word that law enforcement had been called to Kid Rock's Honky Tonk Rock 'N Roll Steakhouse to handle a disruptive patron outside the establishment.
~~~
"When the Metro police officers arrived to the location to assist security the defendant took out his colostomy bag from the inside of his front pants area and started to swing the bag around from left to right hitting two of the Metro police officers with his feces.” (source)  

Kid Rock’s bar was throwing a big party to celebrate the lifting of the mask mandates. What a great time and place to be maskless –a crowded bar with sweaty patrons, one of whom is spraying the crowd with shit. I’m just a little surprised the poo flinger wasn’t Kid himself.

Clowns, Yogurt, and Zombies (Oh My)

I’m not one of those champagne socialists. Nope. I’m a part of the Prosecco proletariat. When/if you insult me, DO keep your slams demographically accurate.
~~~
Is the Gums McTinyface fuss over yet? Have the MAGAts accepted that the killer’s one of their own yet? I realize they were really counting on him being a Black, transgendered, vegan, drag queen, Democrat with blue hair but, c’mon. We can’t always get what we want in life…or death.

While VP Many Names plays podcast bro, screeching about us vile lefties (Christ almighty, he’s an absurd, clueless, annoying twat), his boss is sending the National Guard into Memphis. Killing tourism in a Red State – damn that bloated orange ogre continues to eat his own. I’m sure Tennessee’s Republican governor is giddily awaiting all those lost tourist dollars.
~~~
Prez Pedo is trying to clean up the giant stinking mess after his goon squads took a big-ass dump all over the multiple years of planning and efforts by Georgia Senator Jon Ossoff and Governor Brian Kemp to bring the Hyundai factory to Georgia. The plant, at minimum, would have brought 8,500 good jobs to the state.

Stinky the Clown Prez lamely speechified that:

“When Foreign Companies who are building extremely complex products, machines, and various other ‘things,’ come into the United States with massive Investments, I want them to bring their people of expertise for a period of time to teach and train our people how to make these very unique and complex products…"

and blah, blah, blah. WAY too little, and FAR too late, fart man. Miller and Noem’s rabid ICE zombies were already unleashed. It’s only getting worse from here.

South Korean leaders have warned the treatment of those at the Hyundai plant could discourage future investment in the U.S. South Korean officials said Monday the country would investigate whether its workers were subject to any human rights violations during the raid. (source) 

Mr. Art of the Deal shot himself, and the entire country, in the face yet again. What sane country and company would send their citizens to the US where their freedom and lives are at totally for reals, serious risk?
~~~
I saw that Ivanka is now spokesmodeling with Chobani yogurt. WHY is Chobani partnering with that plastic griftasaurus on anything? 

I did a little light googling to find out.

Grifter Barbie, in an obvious attempt to rehabilitate her fatally damaged reputation, cofounded a for-profit company called Plant Harvest. The company’s goal is to reduce food waste by selling misshapen or undersized crops. Instead of tilling these back into the soil, they’re sold to food companies who use the unpretty or runt fruits and veggies in sauces, purees, and such. 

This is a for-profit biz.  

The reduced food waste concept is similar to the recycled paper biz. That is, there’s always waste when creating reams, pallets, boxes of paper. The paper scraps – which have never been used in any way – are put back into the paper making slurry. Et voila – pre-consumer recycled paper.  Paper that’s been printed on or otherwise used, goes through a reclamation/recycling process and goes on to become post-consumer recycled paper.

Best I can tell from all the corporate-speak on Planet Harvest's website, what they do is connect farmers with companies who will buy their not-ready-for-produce-display-case fruit and veg.

Companies who do the same or similar?

• Full Harvest: An online B2B marketplace for surplus and imperfect produce. Their Mission – To empower sustainability at the root level with the produce business marketplace for all grades, including surplus & off-grade.
• Performance Produce: A company that specializes in the supply of fresh produce and logistics services for the food industry
• Uglyus: A South Korean online platform that sells imperfect fruits and vegetables directly to consumers.
• FarmTheory: A technology platform, based in Bangalore, connecting farmers directly with businesses to sell their produce.
• Platform Zero: A B2B tech company that tackles supermarket food waste by connecting retailers with surplus produce to a network of business buyers, including restaurants and small businesses.
• Too Good To Go: An app that connects customers with restaurants and stores that have surplus food.

Chobani sources all their strawberries through Plant Harvest. So, there’s the 'Vanky/Chobani connection. 

It would be disingenuous to say that I’m boycotting Chobani because they do business with a Trump owned company. I don’t buy that brand anyway. When I yogurt shop I get the store brand Greek style or coconut milk stuff. 

Now that I know Chobani is proudly working with the ethically bankrupt Trump, it’d be foolish to trust their product integrity. The Trump name is synonymous with toxicity. Why would Chobani do this to themselves? 

WHO doesn't love tacos?

We had tacos for dinner last night. You?

In case you missed it, some clever folks on Wall Street came up with a term for our idiot president’s tariff batshittery. They’re calling it TACO trade. That stands for ‘Trump Always Chickens Out’.

“Trump’s style in negotiating deals is he huffs and he puffs, but he doesn’t blow the house down,” Ed Yardeni, president of Yardeni Research, told CNBC. (source)  

He’s all bluster, bullshit, and ham-handed, halfassed artifice and the whole world’s got his number now. He’s fooling no one but his cult of morons

The overemotional clown freaked out at a journalist yesterday who dared to ask for his response to financial analysts new term for his trade style. 

"Oh, I chicken out. Isn't that nice? I've never heard that," Trump said during the exchange, before defending his recent decisions to slash his tariffs on China for the next 90 days and extend his deadline for a 50% tariff on goods from the European Union until July 9. (source) 

He hasn’t heard that because he only watches “news” shows that fellate him 24/7.

He then said to the reporter "Don't ever say what you said because that's a nasty question.” Christ almighty, he sounds like a four year old and I’m being generous. A guy on Threads suggested that every time Cheato says a journalist’s question is “nasty,” the next thing that should be asked is, “President Obama took tough questions like this. Why won’t you?”

Ooooooo, that would just cause him to explode, wouldn’t it?! Man-o-man, that’s an interview with this slug from Hell (not to diss Hellion slugs mind you) that I’d actually watch. Fer fuck’s sake, I’d make popcorn and root for myocardial infarctions, cerebrovascular oopsies, and other miscellaneous excitement.

Make no mistake, it’s not just the old, incontinent, second rate, WAY-off-the-Vegas-Strip Jabba the Hutt impersonator and White House resident who’s making grand declarations and then collapsing like a deck chair under…well…the weight of president Jabba the Hutt.

Look at Senators Josh Hawley of Missouri, Susan Collins of Maine, Rick Scott of Florida, Ron Johnson of Wisconsin, Rand Paul of Kentucky, and Utah’s Mike Lee. They’re saying they won’t vote for Dipshit Donnie’s ‘Big, Beautiful, Bill’ (OH spare me!) Why? Because, essentially, it doesn’t rob and rape us regular, non-filthy rich citizens nearly enough. For all the wrong reasons, these trash brained weasels could save us. Will they? Fuck no. Republicans always cave to their big Daddy. They’re a bunch of spineless, bullying, perpetually on-the-take frauds. 

THEY always chicken out too. It’s the Republican way.

Backing down can become a way of life.
~ Oliver James

Courage is fire, and bullying is smoke.
~ Benjamin Disraeli

Look into the eyes of a chicken and you will see real stupidity. It is a kind of bottomless stupidity, a fiendish stupidity. They are the most horrifying, cannibalistic and nightmarish creatures in the world.
~ Werner Herzog 

I know a few people who raise chickens (the birds, not republicans). They would vociferously disagree with Herr Herzog but, well, gotta sich in die Lage des anderen versetzen.

I'm not counting any chickens.
~ Jeff Bridges

Love, Death + Cats

We, the Valhalla crew, binge-watched John Scalzi’s Love Death + Robots offerings yesterday. Oh my magnificent Medusa these are awesome+++! Mind you, we’d seen four of them before but they are totally fresh the second time around. In fact, I want to see them all again NOW!

• Three Robots (Season 1, Episode 1)
• When the Yogurt Took Over (Season 1, Episode 6)
• Alternate Histories (Season 2, Episode 5)
• Three Robots: Exit Strategies (Season 3, Episode 1)
• The Other Large Thing (Season 4, Episode 5)
• Smart Appliances, Stupid Owners (Season 4, Episode 9)

My favorites? This morning they’re Three Robots: Exit Strategies and The Other Large Thing. Scalzi knows that cats will take over the world one day. It’s a sure thing they’ll be better caretakers of the planet than humans. Hells bells, a dead rat would do a better job.
~~~
I’ve been a vegetarian for a lot of years now. Weirdly, despite the fact that meat grosses me way the fuck out, curious cravings occasionally ambush me. Yesterday fer instance.

Me (texting Jen): WHY do I all of a sudden have a stone need for a steak and cheese sub with pepper jack cheese, onions and jalapeños?!!!

   I ask you?!!! I mean, FFS!

Jen: Hah!!! Oni says it’s because they’re good !

Me: 😖

Me: Next thing ya know I’ll be wanting an IPA or 6 and will be trolling for one night stands.

   What am I? 19 again?

   Christ almighty!

Yeah, I didn’t indulge that yearning (which would have done a real number on my poor flesh and fowl eschewing digestive tract anyway).
~~~
I follow a few Ukrainians on Threads. This morning one posted that a Russian bomber, that had been on its way to bomb them (in Kyiv?), was shot down by Russian air defense last night.

How very trumpian. Is the “criminally incompetent” Pete Kegseth moonlighting for the Russian military now? Is he authoring their attack strategies? Has he texted the bombing plans on hacktastic Facebook Messenger yet? Did he include journos from WAPO and Fox not-really-the-news on the group chat? Maybe Putin’s having Monty Python or Stanley Kubrick write his scripts now?

Whatever – keep it up dude, you're aces!
~~~
I know I said I felt really good yesterday. I was so pleased with myself that, not only had I bounced back from a bad, weak-ass, what-the-fuck’s-up-with-this-wonk-ass-body patch, but I had increased BOTH my PT exercising AND my daily time on the elliptical. YIPPEE! Well, I crashed. All I could manage yesterday was acts of hygiene, getting dressed, and walking next door for teevee time. So, this week all I did was just four out of seven days versus five.

S’ok…

It’s all right, it’s all right
You can’t be forever blessed
Still, tomorrow’s going to be another working day
And I’m trying to get some rest
That’s all I’m trying to get some rest
American Tune – Paul Simon 

I'll get back up on the exercise horse today.

Lion's Teeth

Dandelion
     noun
well-known plant of the daisy family found in Europe, Asia, and North America, with a tapering, milky root, producing one large, yellow flower, late 14c., a contraction of dent-de-lioun, from Old French dent de lion, literally "lion's tooth" (from its toothed leaves), a translation of Medieval Latin dens leonis. From Latin dens (genitive dentis) "tooth," from PIE root *dent- "tooth" + leonis, genitive of leo "lion"
I love it when dandelions grow through cracks in sidewalks. It’s heroic. They give me hope. If a wee flowering herb can triumph over cruel, soulless concrete, surely we can triumph over the burnt sienna Bozo’s ruthless and devious Fascist Party.

You probably know this already but, every part of the dandelion—flower, root and stems—is edible.

You can make tea from the leaves AND the roots. It contains vitamins A, C, and K, folate, calcium and potassium. It’s also a fine diuretic. So, they’re good for our kidneys.Tea made from the roots has a detoxifying action on the liver. Really! It’s also good at clearing up acne.

The much maligned dandelion has antioxidant properties too. Yes, they can help to prevent or delay some types of cell damage. Dandelions can assist in managing blood pressure and blood sugar AND lower cholesterol. They can reduce inflammation too.

Wine can be made from dandelion flowers.

Wine made from dandelion blossoms has an ancient legacy in Europe as a low-cost substitute. Dandelions flourish even in dry, sparse conditions. Therefore, the custom was carried on by settlers in the Plains States of North America.
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Dandelion wine is essentially more alcohol than wine because it is warm and rich, comparable to a fine bourbon. You can prepare a drink that’s very sugary by using only the yellow sepals, or you can use the entire bloom to give it a little extra zing. There are many different techniques to produce dandelion wine, but as a general principle, you should acquire one liter of wildflowers for every liter of wine you intend to brew. (source)

You can find an ingredient list and recipe here.

Dandelion roos can be cooked and consumed like carrots. They’re actually more nutritious than spinach and broccoli. Wowie kazowie, eh?

A lovely veggie dish to try is dandelion greens with double garlic. Ya know, anything with “double garlic” is gonna be stupendous.

How about a wild spring green pizza?

Try a dandelion pumpkin seed pesto. MMMMMMMMMMMMMM, pesto!

Dandelion flower cookies? YES!

More here.

Never EVER cook and eat dandelions that have been treated with chemicals! I’m talkin’ weed killer here. I know, I know DUH but I gotta say it.

What is a weed? A plant whose virtues have not yet been discovered.
~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

Hear Me Out Now…

For Easter, Jen got me a basket filled with fabola treats from Hilliards. They’re a fourth generation family-run chocolatier and candy maker.

The standout prize was a dark chocolate egg with cookies and cream type filling. Seems to me that these awesome eggs should be available every month—NOT just at Easter.

We could make them seasonally appropriate. Fer instance:

January

In January we celebrate Jen’s birthday. WHY this isn’t a national fucking holiday is beyond me. In honor of Saint Jen (who IS the patron saint of dark chocolate, perfectly grilled brussels sprouts, and spinach/feta scones) Hilliards should make dark chocolate, pistachio cream filled uteri to honor our very own cancer surviving hero.

February
This is such a bleak fucking month. Thank Boreas it’s the shortest one.

To get through it, I do believe we need white chocolate reproductions of roadside snowbanks. These will be festooned with dark choc sprinkles (to simulate the ever present filthy car exhaust coating) and filled with crushed hazelnuts.

They should also offer Lupercalia treats. Could there be anything nicer than that? Top off your traditional Lupercalian dinner of roasted goat with a raspberry cordial filled Romulus and Remus. Sweet, tasty, and you’ll be warding off evil spirits and infertility (or fertility—your choice).

March
Celebrate the month of Saint Patrick with milk chocolate serpents filled with a Jameson’s infused creamy ganache. Yes, we’re banishing the snakes from Ireland in the most delish manner. Okay, okay, like so much else in religions, this is bullshit (snake shit?). There never were any snakes for him to yeet BUT, we fragile humans need champions like the tooth fairy, Santa, and Superman. So, St. Patrick chocolate snakes it is!

April
April first is International Edible Book Day. I was unaware of this food loving bibliophile day. It’s a celebration of French gastronome Jean-Anthelme Brillat-Savarin. What better way to honor the man than with than with marzipan filled chocolate versions of your favorite tomes?

Me? I’m going with Pynchon’s Gravity's Rainbow because it's the only version I’ll ever finish and fully appreciate.

May
Celebrate Cinco de Mayo, the day the Mexican army trounced the French at the Battle of Puebla in 1862. Do it with Aztec Wonder Cookies!

Also Memorial Day is in May. This calls for dark chocolate tombstones filled with the ghosts (vanilla/mint cream) of our dearly departed loved ones, duh.

June
June is Black Music Month. Celebrate with milk and dark chocolate disks imprinted with fabola versions of the album covers of Jimi Hendrix, Richie Havens, Eartha Kitt, and Etta James.

July
The first of July is Canada Day. Celebrate our bedeviled-by-us northern neighbors with chocolate maple leaves filled with maple syrup.

August
August is my birthday month so, OF FUCKING COURSE, Hilliards should be making dark chocolate brains with all manner of fillings. There will be raspberry, cherry, Jamison’s, blackcurrant, and Amaretto cordials. Pecan and walnut butters. Grand Marnier ganache. Whole blueberries and cranberries. There will be one big brain with cookies and cream inside. //mmmmmmm//

September
This is Happy Cat Month. According to Cake, Skitter and Walter EVERY month is Cat Month. Of course.

Happy Cat Month is about recognizing the joy our feline friends bring to our lives and doing our best to return the favor. By creating a stimulating environment, engaging in regular play, and prioritizing their health, you can help your indoor cat live a rich and fulfilling life. (source)

October
Halloween’s treat will, naturally, be a ghost. White chocolate with coconut cream inside.

November
In honor of the harvest they should make gourds, pumpkins, ears of corn, and dark chocolate turkeys, all with cranberry filling.

December
Who doesn’t love chocolate dreidels? I’m askin’ ya?! For the adults, there will be rum ganache insides. The kids can have caramel dreidels.

Obviously Hilliards needs to hire me as a product developer. I’ve got zillions of ideas for chocolate.