TeaTime Troubles

Jen, Oni and I have four (FOUR) days to wait before the new ep of Lucifer comes out. What about Ten you ask? He joins us for the occasional Star Trek but is not up for our other silly choices.

It’s a three day weekend and then there’s our mid-week tea (AKA teevee time)—what EVAH will we do!?

First idea—try new shows.

Toward that end we teed up Jessica Jones. It’s billed a dark super-hero tale (Marvel). Sounds good, eh?

Haunted by a traumatic past, Jessica Jones uses her gifts as a private eye to find her tormentor before he can harm anyone else in Hell's Kitchen. (source)

I have some issues (don't I always).

I’m under the impression that the time frame/the period in which this is supposedly occurring is ‘present day.’ Given this, how the hell can Ms. Jones live in a beat to shit dive of an apartment in Hell's Kitchen, no less? I mean, seriously now, most of Manhattan has undergone heavy Disneyfication and Hell's Kitchen is smack dab in the center of where the gentrification bomb went off.

Next the story arc in this first ep is way too fucking long. If I wanna wait that long to see Jessica’s strength and resolve bloom out of tragedy I can just look at my own damn life.

Third, Jessica wears some heavy duty red, red lipstick. Cool, cool. It goes well with her dyed black hair. Here’s the thing though, she goes to sleep without cleaning it off and there’s NEVER a stain on her pillow and sheets. Verisimilitude? We need some verisimilitude at table seven please.

In the last scene, Jessica races down the stairs to save the sweet Iowan parents of the poor possessed NY university girl (manipulated by an evil anti-hero). Turns out J's desperately divey apartment/PI office is in a building with white marble walls, gold trim and brilliant lighting. Emmmm, table seven is experiencing some mondo dissonance. Perhaps we need to firebomb table seven?

Lastly, Jones’ only superpower seems to be a surfeit of strength. Not emotional but physical. That’s lovely but both or just some extras (like x-ray vision or some such) would be better.

All in all, the show was TOO fucking intense for us and discrepancy city to boot.

From here we moved on to The Flash. Light-ish but much better. 

So, until next weekend, when our lovely Lucifer returns, we’re rewatching Discovery, digging into The Flash and, possibly, we’ll even check out Cruella.