Watching the Detective

Pics from Ten's dawn walk

Or, in this case, reading them.

As I mentioned a few days ago, I'm wild about Helene Tursten's An Elderly Lady Must Not Be Crossed. I picked up the first book in another of her detective series hoping for more dry wit and smart, savvy women.

I was a bit disappointed. Why?

The protagonist, a young big city cop, falls for a guy who’s flying a whole yardarm worth of red flags. I know, I know…cops are human and subject to all the same flaws as the rest of us. STILL, I would think that, as a police officer and the supposedly intelligent, well respected hero of this tale, she’d know enough not to bang a potential suspect no matter how fit, blue eyed and high cheekboned.

This, the inability to either see OR take warning signs seriously is something that makes me want to scream. It isn’t just about an implausibly constructed main character, it’s personal. I’ve known a few women who’ve lost years of their lives to abusers (physical and/or mental).

I totally get that people change over time. What may start out as a magic fairy tale romance can turn into a bog of bovine poop. Know what you do when this happens? You embrace reality and get the fuck out. You protect yourself.

Even at the tender age of 13, I could pick an asswipe or potential abuser out of a clot of humans. Why is that? I’m cute but not THAT cute and I’ve always had a, we’ll call it, quirky personality. My heroes as a tween were Mae West and Dorothy Parker so, as you can guess, I’ve a history of tart tongued assholery. There was never a line of good OR bad dudes waiting to ask me out. Maybe the scarcity of suitors gave me to chance to observe and learn? //shrugs//

Back to Tursten’s villain though, the dude had charms but the warning signs were flashing right at the starting gate. How could they be overlooked?

This detective was not believably written. If, from a young age, I could recognize predatory pricks, why couldn’t a 30 year old police officer? Aren’t cops supposed to be more than a little cautious and suspicious?

The other issue I had with the story—the murder happened during a moose hunting expedition. MOOSE! What is the fucking deal with people, in this day and age, looking to shoot and kill animals? I get that, if you’re a meat eater and poor, hunting and fishing may be necessary ways to feed your family. Otherwise, what is the goddamn, motherfucking point of purposefully killing animals with whom we share this benighted planet? Is it pure, unadulterated sadism? Does it make the killer feel better about having a tiny todger? Has the gun toter been insulted by a deer or moose and has a devastating need to exact revenge?

I so liked Tursten’s Old Lady book and hoped the tone would be carried over into her other series. I’ll try another of her stories—one NOT centered on animal murders—to see if Policewoman Bad-Judgment-Betty was a fluke. 

Watching the Detective—Elvis Costello