Assorted

Ten asked me what I wanted for lunch yesterday. I was peckish but unsure of what exactly I wanted to eat. I suggested:

• Iguana stuffed with cheddar glazed toenail clippings
• Spinach and carrot infused cookie dough ice cream
• Scrambled squid brains on grilled eggplant toast
• Crispy lizard feet crêpes
• Lobster and glitter goulash
• Squash Tylenol smoothie
• Garlic and hair stuffed cell phone pockets

His response? I thought you were a vegetarian.
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Jen and I went to the Feet of Clay pottery studio Holiday Sale yesterday.

20+ years ago I was one of the managers there (one of four). My friend Holly was also a manager. We shared a small space and, just generally, adored each other’s work. Over the past six or seven years we fell out of touch. Between The Amazing Bob’s health tanking, her’s going downhill and then my own disasters, we had a lot on our plates. Holly died in January of ’21.  TAB in July of 2016. Me? I'm not dead yet!

The Holiday Sale included a memorial to her (which was the only reason I went. I really don't need more mugs, plates and vases in the house, nor do I have room. Having said that, it was nice to have a look around.). This was the first time I’ve been out of the house to go anywhere besides Mass General or Mass Eye and Ear in, what feels like, forever. I was happy to find that all shoppers were required to wear face masks. Too bad all stores aren't so smart.
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I had an astoundingly happy dream. The Amazing Bob was still alive (AND wildly healthy). We were sitting on the beach just enjoying the view when all our neighbors came down the seawall steps for a swim and frolic in the low waves. Someone brought a small bike—TAB jumped on and went joyously wheeling around the shoreline and into the shallows.

While sitting on a boulder watching all the fun, I, all of a sudden, noticed there was a baby—not a cat—curled up on my lap. Then I woke up.

‘the fuck does this mean? Who or what was the baby symbolizing? I'm hardly a baby person unless of course it's baby animals. //shrugs//
~~~
Slam of the day (courtesy of Urban Dictionary):
Schrödinger's Douchebag
     Someone who is a jerk and decides whether they were joking or not based on how people reacted.

"Oh man, women should just stay in the kitchen. It's the only place they're useful"
     *with one group* "Haha just kidding, that's sexist"
     *with another* "lol amirite"

"You're a total schrödinger’s douchebag you know that right?"

I've worked with more than a few clods like this. If you're gonna be a feces covered dildo, OWN it! You wanna say some rascist and/or misogynistic crap? Do it and take your deserved beating. No one thinks you're joking and most find your "wit" as clever as a dead mollusk.

Ummmm, happy last day of the weekend!