Adulthood

A painting professor in college once said to me that no one is truly an adult until they’re 40.

What does it mean to be an adult?

Adult
     noun
a person who is fully grown or developed.
     verb
behave in a way characteristic of a responsible adult, especially by accomplishing mundane but necessary tasks.

Okay, the verb definition is not as specific as I’d like. “Responsible adult?” Apart from paying your bills on time, what does being a responsible adult entail?

How ‘bout this:

A) Being able to see, understand and accept the consequences of your actions. e.g.:

1) If you blow your paycheck on drinks out with chums or other frivolities you may not have dough to pay the rent. If you can’t pay the rent, you’ll eventually be reduced to couch surfing (if you’re lucky) or checking in at a shelter.

2) If you break into the Capital in an effort to overthrow democracy, you're probably, eventually, going to end up in jail. Yes, even if your skin is lily white and you own your own biz.

3) If you’re a rude-ass motherfucker to your co-workers and/or boss, you’ll, at the least, ruin your rep and lose people’s trust and confidence. Acting like a rageaholic, condescending piece of wet weasel excrement in real life doesn’t actually win you friends, huzzahs or iced mocha brownies. Yeah, go figure.

B) Being able to plan ahead. e.g.:

1) You want to move to a nicer/bigger place? Is there money in your budget for this? If not, what’s your plan for increasing your income. Don’t have one? Get one!

2) I want to visit the Shetland Islands and Norway—to do so I’ll need to, yes, plan ahead:
a. Save up X amount of money for plane tickets, B&B, food, etc.
b. Research what challenges there might be for me, a person using a walker, in getting around.
c. Can I download a reliable voice to text apps which will translate Norwegian to English on the fly?

C) Being able to walk a mile or two in other’s footwear. In order to be considered a responsible adult, a person should have developed empathy and compassion for others AND themselves.

D) Diplomacy, diplomacy, diplomacy.

Diplomacy is the ability to tell someone to go to hell in such a way that they look forward to the trip.
~  Winston Churchill

Diplomacy, n. is the art of letting somebody else have your way.
~ David Frost

As a member of Congress, I'm often reminded that in baseball, as in diplomacy, you have to know when to hit, when to run, and when to show grace.
~ Linda Sanchez

This has always been a hard one for me. I still, at this obscenely advanced age, often fail to convert Angry/Annoyed Donna language into Kind/Convincing Donna speech before I speak. (BAD Donna)

n.b., practicing diplomacy is NOT the same as being a doormat. I can calmly, cleanly and even forcefully stand up for myself, make a case for this or that without ripping a crass motherfucker’s head clean off and shitting down his/her neck. Really I can!

Seems to me, given this list, some folks never achieve adulthood. Me? I’m a work in progress but, on the whole, I think I hit adultness sometime in my mid-40s. You?

What would you add to this list of adult imperatives?