Strange New Episodes

The only thing I hate as much as country music is musical theater. Now that I’m deaf and WAY out of school, I never have to deal with that bastardization of song again…right? Correct...C'MON?!

Wrong and nope-a-reeno.

Given my loathing for this entertainment genre, why did I have to deal with musicals in school? I really enjoyed working backstage, painting sets and such. Plus, a lot of the theater kids, while socially a LOT more ept than yurs-misfit-truly, were different—not jocks/cheerleaders, not brainiac nerds or generic populars. Theater kids seemed more creative, fun and interesting. Also, less judgmental. Doing stagecraft was also a way to get out of my family’s turbulent home, be around safe-ish humans AND do something fun.

The actual music? Definitely NOT my bag.

Anyway, Jen, Oni and I were watching Star Trek: Strange New Worlds last night. This is the series with a healthy and awesome Captain Christopher Pike in charge of the Enterprise. It immediately precedes the original 1960s series.

The episode we watched before last night’s show was sad as hell. It dealt with war, specifically the Klingon Wars and the Battle of J’gal. Dr. Joseph M’Benga and Nurse Christine Chapel were both there, on the ground, trying to save lives. M*A*S*H in space without a speck of humor. 

M’Benga and Chapel still bear the emotional scars of battle. Of fucking course!

War, huh, yeah
What is it good for?
Absolutely nothing
Say it again, y'all
War, huh (good God)
What is it good for?
Absolutely nothing
Edwin Starr—War

After watching Cloak of War, I was looking forward to a lighter storyline. Imagine my utter surprise and chagrin when this next ep turned out to be a musical.

An accident with an experimental quantum probability field causes everyone on the USS Enterprise to break uncontrollably into song, but the real danger is that the field is expanding and beginning to impact other ships – allies and enemies alike. (source)

Appropriately, the story makes it clear that heightened emotion is what causes the characters to sing — which is, of course, the underlying rationale of music theater. (source)

At least they
gave a reason for pulling this horror show of a stunt.

By the by, the tunes were written by Kay Hanley of Boston band Letters to Cleo fame and Tom Polce.

The only tune I wish I could’ve heard was the one with rapping Klingons. Okay, they only showed a snippet of that but it looked way more fun than the soggy, morose songs performed by the Enterprise crew. They all appeared overwrought and the lyrics, in closed captioning, were just dripping with young adult angst.

MAYBE I would have enjoyed the show if I could’ve heard the tunes? I very much doubt that. I still had hearing when the Buffy episode—Once More With Feeling—came out. It was disappointing and underwhelming to say the very least. I was a HUGE fan of the show (as I am of Strange New Worlds) but this was just too damn much…just beyond the pale.

There’s just one episode left to this season of Strange New Worlds. I could do with some NOT singing Tribbles or, possibly, a rousing, scary Borg story. Oh wait, wait—I've got an idea!  What if there was a Next Generation Borg ep with singing and dancing? It’d just have to be in an Anything Goes style though. How about a Borg Queen/Picard duet of You’re the Top? 

Genius, no?!