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Monday, November 20, 2023

Misanthropy R Us

 Latest Threads trend—Follow Women. All women. Let’s build inclusive communities! Sounds cool but I smelled a whiff of clubbishness. Always-second-guessing-Donna (that's me, by the way) thought, I’m just being misanthropic…as usual.

Then I noticed that most of the folks posting this and inviting follows also attached a pic of themselves. The vast majority were white, trim, pretty (some to the point of being downright glamorous) with great hair and were relatively young (definitely under 60). Also, there were a disproportionate number of “blondes.” NONE look like me with my crooked teeth, nerve damaged, twisted mouth, one eye bigger than the other and a scalp with a bazillion scars (which just means that I have, not so much a hairstyle as, a hair-mess a la Gossamer of Bugs Bunny fame).

The let’s-ALL-follow-each-other posts felt like a cattle call invite to pledge a sorority—a club I’d never be accepted into and wouldn’t join even as a joke. As I was shudder-scrolling I came across a couple women’s posts who gave voice to some of what I was thinking about the too nice “selfies,” the unnerving consistency of appearance.

One person theorized that these were/are “influencers.” Another mentioned that most weren’t following back—that these are follower collectors, audience builders, NOT women looking to join or create community at all.

Maybe some really are sincere but I totally need more of a reason to follow someone than “we both have vaginas.”


Who would I not follow? MAGAts, science deniers and Republi/Fascists in general. Who DO I follow? Artists, photographers, potters, authors, scientists, wits, cat/dog/animal people and left leaning political types.

This morning I saw some epic dissing of a woman who dared say she was not going to “support” (did she mean follow?) women who are TERFs, SWERFs, intersectional and a bunch of other jargon I also didn’t understand.

Honestly, I know I’m old and desperately unhip to all the new lingo BUT if you’re going to take some noble stand, if you’re all but proclaiming that you’re more righteous and intelligent than everyone else, you might want to avoid speaking in code.

Her attackers weren’t much, if at all, better. Okay, they were every bit as cluelessly opaque. It truly seems that they all think that this new follow women trend is some big social activist deal versus:

A) A way to boost your follower count, sell your wares, become internet famous
      OR
B) For the sincere, a way to broaden your group of friends and, in some infinitesimal way, be supportive women you don’t actually know and, likely, never will.

On the internet, no one knows that you're really a cat/dog/octopus/wombat in human drag.

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