Bon Mots

Below are some words that I just like the sound of. Their meanings are somewhat irrelevant (to me). With a few exceptions, it’s not entirely likely they’ll find their way into my usual conversational styling (or maybe they will!).

Balderdash
     noun
senseless talk or writing

This word’s tremendously apt in this era of Republi/Fascist idiocy. Pretty much everything spewed from the mouths of Trumpers is utterly toxic balderdash.

Spatchcock
     noun
a chicken or game bird split open and grilled.

Now that I know what it means, I don’t find it quite so amusing. I was thinking a spatchcock was akin to a shuttlecock on steroids.

Diphthong
     noun
a sound formed by the combination of two vowels in a single syllable, in which the sound begins as one vowel and moves toward another (as in coin or loud)

.

Sounds more like a type of pointless and desperately uncomfortable underwear.

Spermologist
     noun in botany
one who treats or collects seeds

Alternatively, in humans, this is a person who studies and determines whether a man's seed is worth a damn. If not, a spermologist makes the call as to whether you should be banished to an ice cave in the Arctic OR sentenced to live out your existence on a completely barren island off the coast of Florida. (the barren island, while ensuring you can’t reproduce, is more humane in that you could conceivably swim to the mainland before becoming a shark's mid-day snack. Of course, IF you survive, you’d be in Florida so…emmm… lose/lose)

Malarkey
     noun
meaningless talk; nonsense

The shit Dark Brandon is totally done with.

Shenanigans
     noun
secret or dishonest activity or maneuvering.

This word sounds like it should be more lighthearted and harmless than the dictionary definition. Like it should apply to actions such as glitter bombing anti-abortion protesters and white supremacists and NOT the vile, slimy, heinous lies and crimes committed daily by the Cheato Party.

Nincompoop
     noun
a foolish or stupid person

i.e., anyone in the GFP party (Grifters for Putin)

Kerfuffle
     noun
a commotion or fuss, especially one caused by conflicting views.

To me it sounds like a description of Sarah Huckabee Sanders fashion sense (nonsense that is).

Governor Sanders enjoys carrying out her official duties dressed in her kerfuffled Halloween cowgirl attire.

Bulbous
     adjective
resembling a bulb especially in roundness

Cheato’s figure most closely looks like as an upside-down, squishy lightbulb.

Queef
     noun
an audible release of air from the vagina, typically during or after sex.

The word sounds funny and it IS hilarious when it happens (or, if you’re humorless, deeply embarrassing) BUT when I read it I immediately think “spliff,” “doobie,” or “blunt.” Why? Beats the fuck outta me but don’t Bogart that Camberwell carrot if you please.

Titillating
     adjective
arousing mild sexual excitement or interest; salacious.

*giggle* the word tits is sort of titillating *giggle*

Blunderbuss
     noun
a short-barreled large-bored gun with a flared muzzle, used at short range.

Dunno, this sounds more like an archaic term for breasticles as in “he tried to grab her blunderbuss but she ducked out of his reach just in time.”

Haboob
     noun
a violent and oppressive wind blowing in summer, especially in Sudan, bringing sand from the desert.

NOT actually a reference to mammory glands but it ALWAYS brings a childish grin to my face.

Cockwomble
     noun
slang for a person, usually male, who is prone to making outrageously stupid statements and/or inappropriate behaviour while having a very high opinion of their own wisdom and importance.

e.g., Cheato

Collywobbles
     noun
stomach pain or queasiness.

When I imagine the horrors we’re in for if the party of Putin wins anything in November, I get a radical case of the collywobbles.