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Thursday, June 24, 2021

Claustrophobia and Shit

Paraphrasing Veronica Roth:

Hearing him talk about his father, about his intact family, makes my chest hurt for a second, like someone pierced it with a needle.

Sadness was so claustrophobic

~ Kiran Desai, The Inheritance of Loss

I’m ridiculously claustrophobic lately.  It’s so overwhelming that I can’t wear my night time eyepatch or my daytime compression sock (to help me with the stupid blood clot in my wonk-ass leg) The last time I was so banjaxed by claustrophobia was when Dr. Ojeman died. Remember him? My first neurosurgeon. The man who taught me how to read my own MRIs. My second father.

My overpowering claustrophobia makes sense to me now. After all, my first father just died.

It’s from a song about lost romantic love but it still applies.

And she said losing love is like a window in your heart
Everybody sees you’re blown apart
Everybody sees the wind blow

Paul Simon – Graceland 

Again, about romance BUT…

That's what you are
Though near or far

Nat King Cole – Unforgettable 

Sorrow eats time. Be patient. Time eats sorrow.
~ Louise Erdrich, LaRose

His absence is so big it's like he's there.
~ Patrick Ness, The Knife of Never Letting Go


There comes a time when something changes you... No matter the impact... Where the world no longer beats in time with you

~ Solange nicole

I’m surrounded by people and yet, I feel lonely now that Daddy’s gone

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