Observations

Ya know what’s better than having a purring cat on your lap at seven in the AM? Not a whole fucking lot, I’m telling you.

I’m walking better these last couple of days. Maybe I can get back on my recumbent elliptical soon, eh? Also, how long will it be before I can walk to and along the seawall? Better be soon, before the snow and ice hit. Yeah, I’ve got enough sense, finally, to not to take that idiotic risk.

Yeah, I’m psyched.

It’s holiday season. Not a cheery time for all of us. Don’t assume that every single one of us is as screamingly thrilled and joy-joy upbeat as you may be. Give space and peace to those of us who struggle to get through this ‘happiest’ time of the year.

I dreamed of food. Specifically, Oni’s awesome green bean (and other veg) dish. Huh, I guess he’s gonna need to make it again soon.

While I’m still all hyper-vigilant about my health (my foot is really cold/ I’m not urinating enough/ I have pain through my chest—does this mean my tumors are fattening up again?* Am I dying?), I’m beginning to calm the fuck down and accept my wins no matter how small. I’m not seeing every ache, pain and weirdness as a sign that I need more surgery STAT. Yes, it’s wise to have shit checked out but freaking isn’t gonna do me any favors.

Related, PT seemed shorter than usual and less tortuous yesterday. The session was not abbreviated though. Does this mean I’m getting stronger? Little by little, yes.

I tried to return my e-book to the library and take out another one yesterday. Hilarity did NOT ensue. I made a mess of things—think kitten and ball of yarn. Yes, I had to wait for Jen to come home from work to sort it all out for me. I used to be computer savvy—HONEST! Now I’m lucky if I can create a password that’s accepted as ‘strong.’

Ten is making me the most awesome breakfast right now. What is it? Something with shredded potatoes and other veg…I think. Also, a mozarella and brussel sprouts omelette. Whatever he’s making, it’s gonna good. Damn. I’m lucky.

Jen likes to spin around the room in my wheelchair. Puts in mind Blofeld from James Bond movies. Yes, Jen’s all evil mastermindy like that but that's no surprise, right?

*All real symptoms.