Rut-roh

 I’ve been in a rut. What’s your rut look like, I hear (okay, imagine) you asking.

It’s all balance and strength exercising, reading and more of it, dealing with ongoing health shit (side effects or are these new tumor symptoms or my wild imagination? Who the fuck knows but I’m certain that one of the highly educated, trained and lauded docs on my pit crew will fill me in) and then there’s the lounging about doing sad/angry punk-ass impressions of a wasting away Victorian gentlewoman. Busy, busy life but not real fun.

This dull shit gets old. Hells bells, I’M old (just like this tedious routine). It’s past time to get my hemispherical ass in gear and start doing new stuff. 

My initial thoughts?

1) Doodling/painting on large (18”x24”) sheets of paper.

My essential tremors are STILL too out of control to do anything even vaguely realistic but I can play around with colors and see what happens. Fer fucks sake, Matisse changed styles and mediums when his health crapped out—so can I. 

In his later years, Matisse’s health gradually deteriorated. He often had to spend prolonged periods of time on bed rest, or in a wheelchair. Although oil painting in bed would present a challenge, cutting out paper was a technique that could be done virtually anywhere, even when lying down. This technique meant even when he was struggling to stand, he could still exercise the incredible creativity of his mind.  (source)

Also, yes, one of my neurological team is working on the shaking problem. We’re still experimenting with meds. BTW, her name is, awesomely enough, Dr. Goodheart!

The extra added benefit of doodle/painting—since I’ll be working at an easel and will need full range of arm movement, I’ll be standing while scribbling. Standing for even a few minutes at a time counts as balance rehab work. Thus, I get unbored AND stronger at the same time. SO. MUCH. WIN!

Now to explore what I’m able to create with these shaking, twitchy hands and head.

2) Though COVID is back on stage (Ten and I are getting the new booster shots on Monday), careful travel IS possible. ROAD TRIP!

I’m mobile enough to manage short walks, small museum visits and gazing down on gorgeous landscapes from lofty mountaintops. A northern New England trip it will be. Given that our trusty and zippy steed (Godzilla) is fully electric, we’ll need to map out a route with public charging stations in mind. Also, we’ll want to take Cake with us. He’d get lonely if we left him on his own. Yes, Jen and Oni would visit BUT our good boy is used to us being home with him almost 24/7. We don’t want to give our little Angel Butt a complex or anything. We aren’t monsters, ya know!

Extra added benny of the trip? All the research (hotels which allow cats, electric car charging stations and sites we want to scope out) will keep me from doomscrolling.

There must be other new things I can do to pull myself out of Rut Valley but what? My first thought is always let’s go hear some new, rad bands! Yeah…cool but I seem to be deaf. Have been for the past 19 years too. I would have thought I’d be used to that by now.

Nope.

3) Ten and I could explore new places to lunch. Yes, COVID is back but midweek suburban lunch hours aren’t exactly hopping.

We went to a place yesterday which—pre-COVID and before my two years of surgeries and inpatient rehab—I liked. Sadly, it’s lost its charm. The place always tried to come off as upscale (complete with condescending, snooty maître d’). In reality, it was a comfortable, mid-range joint—nice furnishings though. They had decent waitstaff, good bartenders and decent food (though nowhere near enough veggie options). Now? The food’s bland as fuck (in comparison, Gerber’s baby food is wildly seasoned) and the maître d’ (a different one yesterday) is still a prick.

Time to explore other, more interesting options.