Welcome to Monday

The past was alterable. The past never had been altered. Oceania was at war with Eastasia. Oceania had always been at war with Eastasia.
~ George Orwell, 1984

Remember that brittle, anorexic looking twat—one of Dementia Don’s “counselors”—who referred to their spewed tsunami of lies as alternative facts? Yeah, she undoubtedly read 1984 as a training manual.

It, like every other restaurant, bar or gas station in Spain, served tapas. The Spanish invented these small dishes—usually tiny snacks speared with a toothpick—presumably in order to make amends for the Inquisition.

“Sorry we murdered everyone in the name of Christ. Here, try this ham. It’s made from a pig that spent its life drinking port wine while reading the works of Cervantes.”
~ Geraldine DeRuiter, All Over the Place: Adventures in Travel, True Love, and Petty Theft

DeRuiter is stunningly witty. Her dry humor and ability to transform disaster (or “disaster adjacent” happenings) into real laugh out loud hilarity is exactly what I need right now. When I grow up I want to write just like her. What's that you say? I'm already grown up? When the fuck did that happen?! //shrugs// FINE!

We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be.
~ Kurt Vonnegut, Mother Night

I’ve been, more or less, pretending to be an elderly house cat these past two weeks (since my dental surgery). Ya know, there have been daily naps, very careful, slow eating of only the softest foods, staring out the window, biting those who annoy me and trips to the litter box (this being the exercise bits of my day).

I do a bang up job as an old feline. Possibly this will be a permanent shift in my being.

Also, I'm tired of mashed potatoes, soup and pudding. I WANT GRILLED ASPARAGUS, PAKORAS, CRAB RANGOONS AND POPCORN AND I WANT THEM NOW!

Some wise words from John Scalzi:

1. Everyone is entitled to their opinion about the things they read (or watch, or listen to, or taste, or whatever). They’re also entitled to express them online.

2. Sometimes those opinions will be ones you don’t like.

3. Sometimes those opinions won’t be very nice.

4. The people expressing those may be (but are not always) assholes.

5. However, if your solution to this “problem” is to vex, annoy, threaten or harass them, you are almost certainly bigger asshole.

6. You may also be twelve.

7. You are not responsible for anyone else’s actions or karma, but you are responsible for your own.

8. So leave them alone and go about your own life. 

~ Bad Reviews: I Can Handle Them, and So Should You (Blog post, July 17, 2012)

I’ve been spending entirely too much time on Threads lately. There seems to have been a dramatic increase in the number of trolls, rage posters and porn bots lately. Of these, the porn bots are the least obnoxious. They’re annoying but I just block ‘em and move on.

 The bullies, snide delusional nincompoops and rage baiters are another thing. These I also block but unlike the naked butts and zeppelin-esque cleavage shots (easily mistaken for party pics from Mar a Lago), the right wing ragers’ texts aren’t purring entreaties to engage. They drop barely coherent Fox bombs in hopes of engagement. (upsetting the libtards is their oxygen) You just KNOW the post’s “authors” take another pull on their wee, baby cyclops at the very idea of someone yelling back at them.

I shouldn’t kink shame but this seems to be a truly overcomplicated way to satisfy one’s sexual needs. They need therapy—a lot of it. Also, more hand cream. I’m imagining there are an awful lot of desperately chapped dicks out there. 

That and damp, crusty sweat socks.